A Light at the End of the Darkness
by Iota Vixen
Summary: When memories are not an issue and you begin with a fresh slate, who is to say things won't be different. Her brow crinkled and she shook her head. Looking up and voicing her feelings to these people who felt so familiar. "Who are you?"
1. Is this really the end?

My first Twilight fanfiction. I own nothing, just my creative twist. Thanks to Stephanie Meyer for giving me such interesting characters to torment.

Chapter One

Is this really the end?

I'd never given much thought to how I would die – though I'd had reason enough in the last few months – but even if I had, I would not have imagined it like this. I don't think you could really even describe what I was feeling at the moment as pain. Feeling like every fiber in my being was on fire, the most liquid kind burning through my veins and into the very being of my soul. I could very distinctly taste my own blood in my mouth, the coppery taste of it making my already crazed stomach lurch in disgust.

I could hear voices all around me as I fought against the pain, the confusion, and utter agony that assaulted me, hissing and deep guttural snarls. They went silent when a high shriek echoed through the clearing. I couldn't grasp exactly what it was exactly until it stopped, and my vocal cords burned with the misuse of my own voice.

"Goddammit! Are you just going to stand there and do nothing! She fucking dying you filthy bloodsuckers, can't you see her!"

I knew that voice. I'd know it no matter what. It was the center of my salvation and warmth. My sun in the darkness and the filler of any void that I was falling into.

"Jacob? Jacob…please make it stop!" I heard myself scream and reached for him blindly. I could feel only pain and ice around me. A horrify snarl issued as my body was jostled and cold fingers brushed over my over heated brow, which crinkled in confusion. "Bella, I'm here with you. Its going to be alright, I'm right here." The voice whisper to me. I cracked my eyes open to stare at the person holding me gently. "Edward? What…what's happening. Wha-?" As soon as I started to speak, another wave of agony encompassed me and I screamed. "Jaaaaake!"

"Motherfucker, move out of the way!" Briefly I recall the throaty animalistic noises again and then I was surrounding in heat, a heat that reach the core of me and I felt the pain receding slightly. I looked up at him through tears, met the deep brown of his eyes which where swirling in so many emotions. He mustered a weak smile. "Hey honey, I'm so sorry you're hurting right now. But its going to be okay, we're going to fix this I swear to you." His warm hands smoothed the hair sticking to my damp forehead away and I nuzzled into his touched and then the pain began again. I could do nothing but cling to him then.

"Would some one please do something except stand there? I thought you wanted her to live god damn you!" His voice thundered. A small feminine voice began where his left off. "The venom is spreading; we need to make a decision Edward. But we don't have much time-" "I don't know if I can do this again Carlisle, the first time I nearly killed her myself, please-" "Edward, don't you want-" "Someone please do something!"

Their voices swirled around me and I could feel my heart stuttering in my chest, the cold setting in, the absolute feeling of my life leaving me. 'Am I really dying? Is this it?' I asked myself as I felt my heart breaking. Charlie, Renee, and Jacob… Jacob…Jacob…

"Bella? Bella? No Bells, please no stay with me…Bella!

And then there was nothing but darkness.


	2. Familar Faces

Again I don't own Twilight, just like torturing its characters.

Familiar Faces

Chapter 2

I was tumbling through darkness, spinning really. I felt like Alice falling through the rabbit hole. 'Alice?' That name irked me. I felt like someone face other then the girl that had played my favorite wonderland hero should be there. I internally shrugged, silly brain. Now there was the business of trying to stop spinning. The inky blackness of my unconsciousness was seriously getting on my nerves as I swam to the surface of awareness. I heard whispers and the sound of my own voice making incoherent mumbles. 'Wow, I must really be out of it.' I thought. Was waking really supposed to be this difficult?

I felt my eyelids flutter, sticking slightly together like I hadn't used them in months. Then I shut them together tightly again when it felt like my scalp would burst from the overly bright light in the room. There was a rushed scrambling in the room and everything went very dark. 'Great and I'm back in the rabbit hole?' I again tried to pry my too tired eyes open again and was pleased to see the room had just been darkened. 'Oh, thank god.'

Someone was next to me, a fact I only noticed because of a light pressure on my hand. I tiredly moved my head slightly to the side to see who had possession of said hand and was greeted with teary eyes of an older man with a moustache. He squeezed my hand gently again and breathed out a sigh of what sounded like relief. "Oh god Bella, I'm so happy to see you awake hunny. How are you feeling? Do you need anything?"

I stared at him for a moment, just stared. This was all so confusing. I heard a shifting in the room again and turned my gaze out towards it. Two other faces stared back at me. Two beautiful faces. One was tall and slender, pale with bronze hair and pretty amberish eyes. His concerned visage was trained on me, as if waiting for my beck and call.

My brow furrowed again, as I looked at the other in the room. His description would best be described as a sort of beauty. Tall and built, his huge frame took up a surmountable amount of space in this room. His darker skin stretched over thick muscle and his black hair that looked soft was in a messy uproar on his head. His dark eyes watched me, a relieve smile stretching over his mouth. "Bella?"

I started as I came back from my people watching. Looking next to the person who had just spoke. 'Ah, yes the man with the moustache.' "Sweetheart, do you need anything?" he questioned again. I looked at him and moved a bit, the pain that hit me was jarring and I gasped. Next thing I knew the darker skin man was assisting me to sit in a more comfortable position, the other at his side, his face set in a sneer at the fact the other was touching me. 'Interesting much?' I thought through the pain.

When the pain ebbed, the bed I was in tilted up so I was in half a reclined position. Moustache man was still seated next to me, but the darker and the bronzed hair men were too. I blinked my eyes sleepily. Was I really already tired? "I'm going to go get the nurse to check on you since you're awake. But if you want to go back to sleep before I get back its okay, alright." Moustache man said. I nodded briefly and felt lethargy setting in over my body. He careful pressed a kiss on my forehead, which I felt was strange, and walked towards the door and with a quiet click was gone.

The two men in the room abruptly stood and then moved to flank my sides, bronze hair sat in the chair that was just vacated and took my hand, while the other grasped my other. I was definitively perplexed. But okay, maybe they were just worried. Obviously I had just been through something; otherwise people wouldn't be acting this way. Being the center of attention was starting to bother me something fierce though. All the sudden a tickle started in my throat and I felt a cough well up in my chest.

'Oh my god!' I gasped in my head when my ribbed protested the motion. An overly warm hand petted my head and a cup with a straw was place in my visual. I sipped greedily, but noticed the other hand that had tightened during my coughing fit with a bit of trepidation.

I sank back into the bed gratefully after draining the cup and sighed. "Bells, do you want anything else. I'm so sorry hunny, I know you have to be freaking out." I glanced to my left, still trying to grasp everything. 'Freaking out huh? Nah I went through the rabbit hole, this has nothing on that.' I laughed at my own joke in my head. I then turned to the other in the room. My voice rasped a bit but I managed to speak. "I don't mean to offend you, but you hand is really cold. Do you mind letting go?" His hand withdrew immediately as if I had burned him, well I could have. 'There I go again with my bad sense of humor.'

"Bella?" His voice shook a bit. I smiled a bit and apologized. The door opened and three people came in. Moustache man, a woman I assumed to be a nurse, and a rather attractive blonde had to be doctor. He spoke first. "Bella, I can't tell you how glad we are to have you in the land of the living again, would you mind if I look you over."

It was funny, but this tension went up in the air between the two men by me when he had said that. Again with the internal shrug. He approached me and made notes on his clip board. "So how are you feeling right now? Any dizziness or nausea? We have you on some pretty heavy drugs right now…" Huh, that must be why I was feeling like quite the comedian.

I licked my lips and attempted to speak again. I croaked out instead. "Not really anything like that, if I move it hurts though." He nodded and jotted done some more note. "Alright, I'm just going to ask you some simple questions then, ready?" I nodded. God I was tired. "How old are you?" Blank. I mean absolute blank. I frowned. Man drugs really sucked if I couldn't remember that. "Um, can you ask me another, my brains not quite coming up with that one?" The doctor raised his brow. "What is you name?" Again I frowned. "Well I think its Bella, right? That's what everyone's been calling me?"

Silence reined in the room. All their eyes looked at me. It was suffocating. The doctor cleared his throat and walked over to the older man with the moustache. "Bella is your name. But do you know who this is?" The older man looked absolutely freaked. I just shook my head no. The doctor traveled to the bronzed hair man. "And him? Do you remember him?" I was starting to freak out. Was I supposed to know them? Finally his stopped by the giant of a man.

"What about him?" The dark eyes caught mine and held them and I stared. I briefly felt a pull in my soul to him. Tears were welling in my eyes and he nodded to me as if telling me it was okay. I gasped and felt tears running down my cheeks shaking my head back and forth as if denying what was going on. I spoke to him though. "I know I know you. You seem so familiar." And then I was breathing so fast I couldn't comprehend anything. He was by my side in an instant and I felt a bit of calm wash over me.

The doctor walked over to me and pulled a syringe from his white coat, place it in the IV. "I'm going to give you something to calm down Bella, just relax and sleep for a bit. We'll talk soon." I got a since of déjà vo again as I slipped into darkness.

Review people. I need incentive. I also need a beta. Anyone interested?


	3. Sweet Justice

I dont own you Twilight but I sure love to torture your characters!

Sweet Justice

Chapter 3

She was screaming. I mean the kind of scream that rivaled any other the nightmare ones she ever had. I thought those had been bad. This trumped it by about a million times. And the leeches were just standing there looking sad. Why the fuck weren't they doing anything?

It had started off a normal day in forks. If normal counts me being a human gone wolf that took down vamps and had a broken heart from girl who loved those vamps. I wish they had just stayed away. She had finally begun to heal with me, to want me, and even I dare say love me.

It had been the happiest time in my life when she made her way into my life and we had begun to make progress towards a future I was sure would end with her being Mrs. Black. But it had been fucking uprooted as soon as she came back from saving that Cullen freak in Italy. Now she was engaged and as much as I hated her for it, I still loved her more than anything.

We had recently taken out the new born army, that red headed bitch and her lover. Everything was "calming" down so to speak. I was still broken but had subsudued myself with the thought that maybe just maybe I could make it through this, when all hell broke lose. One of the new born vamps had made it through the massacre, the pixie Cullen had said it had stayed in Seattle and had gotten bored and followed its covens scent all the way to Forks.

Apparently Bella blood is like some sort of fucking drug too, because the vamp had been ready to make its self scarce after figuring out what happened to its brothers and sisters, but had caught the blood scent from Bella attempt to distract Victoria. It tracked her all the way to her home and hadn't had to wait long. Bella was driving home, about a mile from her house when the vamp had struck. He had dragged her to a goddamn clearing and wasted no time in making a meal of her.

Luckily Seth was still patrolling the area, and stopped the fucker before he drained her dry, but the damage was already done, she had been poisoned from the venom and was dying right before my eyes. She screamed again and I snarled, my human body trying desperately to phase into the wolf, but I had to hold it together for Bella.

"Goddammit! Are you just going to stand there and do nothing! She fucking dying you filthy bloodsuckers, can't you see her?"

At that everything changed. Edward was holding her and she was curled fatally into herself. Then she had heard my voice.

"Jacob? Jacob…please make it stop!"

I wavered on my feet. I needed to be there with her and as I stalked closer, Edward snarled and cuddled her close.

"Bella, I'm here with you. Its going to be alright, I'm right here." I heard him whisper to her. "Edward? What…what's happening. Wha-?" she cried out and then she screamed again. She screamed my name. No amount of anything would ever stop me from going to her when she screamed my name like that. I could be so injured I would have to drag my body to hers but I would be there.

Cullen struggled with anger when I strode over to them. I raised my head up and growled. He looked like he was going to challenge me and the wolf rose up inside me. "Motherfucker, move out of the way!" I growl and then tempered my temper when I gather Bella up gently.

I smoothed the hair slick with sweat off her forehead and cradled her. "Hey honey, I'm so sorry you're hurting right now. But its going to be okay, we're going to fix this I swear to you." I promised her. I had no idea if it would be alright. But it had to be. I had to make sure she was going to be okay, I had to save her. She gazed up at me with fevered eyes and nuzzled into my hand, her skin though it looked fevered was turning cold.

My heart skipped a beat when she seemed to be trying to push herself into me. To escape into me. But then her brow furrowed and she shook her head desperately as pain took over her again and she just clung to me despondently. I was shocked at the amount of pain that wracked her small frame and I grew angry. "Would some one please do something except stand there? I thought you wanted her to live god damn you!" I felt myself growl.

Pixie Cullen whispered that a decision needed to be made. What fucking decision, she had to live! Then Edward with his speech on being unable to suck out the venom without killing her himself, begging the doc to do it. The docs only reply that he was unsure because she was supposed to be one of them anyway.

Then Bella's heart stalled and she gasped in a shuddering breath. "Bella? Bella? No Bells, please no stay with me…Bella!" I shook her and held her to me and then the good doc was there with his mouth on her seeping wound and I forced every instinct to back down as he worked. It seemed like hours, days, even weeks when he finally pulled away, his mouth ripe with her blood.

"All the venom is removed. Is she still breathing?" he asked shortly. Noticing very shallow shuttering breaths, I nodded. Then it was all I could do to just burrow my head in her neck and be so thankful. "We need to get her to the hospital, there is no telling what could be damaged in the attack or what the venom has done to her body. I could only nod again, my face still burrowed in her neck. I could feel some tears in my eyes.

I stood with her in my arms, holding her delicately. Two vicious growls erupted at either side of me and I went in protective mode, hiding Bella in my size, turning my body. Quil and Seth in wolf form flanked me, glaring down Edward who stood in front of me with his arms outstretched. I scoffed.

"I'm not letting her go until I have too, so move so we can get her to the hospital." I said, seething that he would actually be that stupid.

"Stupidity is that you think she belongs in your arms when it's me who she chose." He replied.

My heart cracked a little at that jib but I persisted and decided to walk around the fucker with my pack watching his every move. Emmett had the jeep running and ready and I hoped in, Bella still in my arms. Edward got in the seat up front and cursed me. Quil jumped in beside me and then we were moving so fast toward the hospital that I had to decide not to hold on to the bitch bar to maintain what pride I had.

We got to the hospital in record time, Emmett was probably fist punching the air somewhere and I hurried into the ER. "Please someone, she needs help right now!" was all I said and then Bella was on a stretcher headed into the ER with about 6 nurses in her wake. Then I was collapsing in a chair. "You okay man, that shit was hard core." Quil said as he sat next to me in one of the too small chairs.

"Okay doesn't really seem to fit the situation. Relieved or scared shitless, now that's something that I can say." I sighed and looked towards the vamp crew. The looked different in varying ways. Edward continued to glare in my direction, then look longingly toward the door of the ER, Alice rung her hands in a nervous gesture, Jasper didn't look any different than usual, and Emmett I was surprised to say looked genuinely worried.

God I hated vampires. Hours passed, and then I noticed a commotion by the door as Charlie literally ripped through the ER waiting room, he glanced around making eye contact with the Cullens, made a step towards them, then saw me and changed direction. "What in the fucking hell happened to my little girl Jacob?" He snapped his eyes wide with fear. Oh shit, how do I explain this?

"I have no idea Charlie, I wasn't with her. I know she was attacked though. I got there after it happened, brought her here and now we re all just waiting to see if she's going to be okay…"

Well mostly true. No need to add in supernatural shit. He took in a deep and shuttering breath and nodded, then made his way over to the front desk, where he demanded to know what was going on. I leaned forward making sure I could hear. "Stable condition for now, she lost a lot of blood, so a transfusion had to be done, but they just put her in a room, visitors should be allowed in within an hour or so."

Thank god she was alive. "You can go home now if you'd like. We have the situation from here Black." Edwards annoying voice persisted. "I'll leave when she wakes up and tells me to leech." We glared at each other some more and then he stalked back to his coven.

When I had said "when she wakes up" I didn't know it'd be two weeks later. The docs said it was a miracle she was even alive and that the coma was just her bodies way of recuperating. It had been a long two week and three men in a room with an unconscious Bella was tough, but I couldn't leave her. I just wanted her to open those luminous brown eyes and smile that smile she only smiled for me. We all played the waiting game. But nothing would have ever prepared me for when she did actually start waking up. My heart beat a thousand miles a minute and I had to repress the urge to pull her into my lap and stroke her face. Edward glared at me again and whispered to quiet for Charlie to hear. "Can you please restrain yourself?"

'Not a chance asshole.' I thought back. But then I focused as Bella mumbled and grumbled into awareness. Her long eyelashes fluttered open and then shut when the light appeared to be too much, I quickly rushed about the room closing blinds and turning off bright lights. She tried again after I was done and blinked sleepily. "Oh god Bella, I'm so happy to see you awake hunny. How are you feeling? Do you need anything?"Charlie sat next to her, holding her hand, she turned slightly and stared at him and stared. She looked like she was struggling to grasp the situation. I shuffled forward; Edward did too right next to me.

She glanced towards us then and I felt the breath knock out of me. She looked at the bastard first, studying him curiously. But then her eyes locked on me and I was shocked. She took everything about me in, studying me below her lashes like she was trying to figure me out. What the fuck is going on here?

"Bella?" Charlie asked again, while I regulated my breathing again. "Sweetheart, do you need anything?" She got this cute look on her face, and then attempted to sit up. Her painful gasp filled the small room and I was at her side instantly, Cullen at my side as I attempted to sooth her. She glanced up at me and studied me again. Then Cullen, his face scrunched up in distaste. Charlie move muttering about getting a nurse to check on her, and her eyes drooped tiredly.

She scrunched up her face then and a rattling cough formed in her lungs, I soothed her again and grabbed the cup of water on the nightstand for her to drink, which she inhaled. I continued to pet her head, ignoring the leeches position on her other side, holding her hand. "Bells, do you want anything else. I'm so sorry hunny, I know you have to be freaking out." She got this funny look on her face then, a slightly insane smile on her face and I wondered what she was thinking.

She cleared her throat and I was so excited that she might speak, and then my heart broke a little when she turned to Edward to grace him with her first words. Her voiced rasped a bit and she smiled shyly. "I don't mean to offend you, but your hand is really cold. Do you mind letting go?" He made a small noise I'm sure meant to be her name and let go quickly. She smiled apologetically.

I could stop the little victory dance in my head and he turned towards me with a heated stare. 'Sorry man, can't help it.' The cavalry arrive moments later in the form of Dr. Cullen, Charlie, and a nurse. He made a crack about her being in the land of the living and I visibly tensed at that joke. He just kind of laughed a bit and began asking Bella questions about she was feeling.

When he started asking those questions about herself, I wanted to laugh at the ridiculousness of it all but stopped as soon as I heard what I did. "What is you name?" She frowned, looking confused and a bit stressed. "Well I think its Bella, right? That's what everyone's been calling me?" Damned if I didn't want to cuddle her to my chest and reassure it was fine. Dr. Cullen raised his brow at that and walked towards Charlie. "Do you know who this is Bella?" she stared and Charlie looked like he'd have a heartache, she shook her head no, and then he progressed to Edward.

He repeated the question, gesturing towards the young vamp. Again a negative. Then he made his way to me. My heart pounded. She turned towards me and I met her eyes, telling her it would be okay, that no matter what I was here and she took a shuddering breath and then her heart was beating so fast I started to worry for her. Then she gasped and I looked at her again, she was shaking her head back and forth, tears falling down her cheeks and she kind of reached for me. "I know – I know you. You seem so familiar."

Her reaction was not one I would have ever guessed, and I was next to her calming her as soon as her breathing accelerated. Dr. Cullen quickly took over and pressed more medicine in her IV and she returned to the world of dreams quickly. I stoked her hand gently.

"I would say she has amnesia then. All signs point in that direction, whether or not it's permanent is a whole different matter. We will just have to give her time with that. The only thing I can recommend is not trying to jar her memories, it can cause more harm than good in many cases." He flipped through his notes, writing something else down. "Her condition other than that is good, she will actually probably be able to leave the hospital in few days, given she is on bed rest."

Charlie stood from the other side of Bella's bed, exhaustion clear on his face. "That's good news then. I'm sure the whole forgetting thing will work itself out, I'm just so happy she's alive." Dr. Cullen smiled then and looked at me. "It's a great thing she survived." I gritted my teeth. "Edward can I speak to you in the hall?" "Hey Jacob I'm going to go get some coffee, want anything?" I shook my head. Then I was left alone with Bella for the first time in a month.

I sat down next to her and laid my head on her hand. Tears of relief and happiness that she was alive slide down my cheeks. "Bella, hunny you can't understand how happy your okay. I'm sorry you forgot everything, but maybe it's a good thing. Now maybe you can just be content with the knowledge that things that go bump in the night are just fairytales. Maybe you can live like a normal woman for a bit." I took a deep breath and nuzzled her skin. She hummed a little and I looked up. She sighed and adjusted as best she could and I smile, standing to brush my hand over hair and face. She turned into my touch and I froze as she whispered almost too quietly to hear.

"Jake."

Bwhahhaha! God I love this Let me know what you think, I love reviews people, so give them to me.


	4. Memories

I don't own Twilight

Memories

Chapter 3

Days seemed to turn in weeks quickly after I was released from the hospital and if I had ever felt this lost I couldn't compare it to anything. There was quite frankly a lock on my brain that didn't allow what had been almost 19 years of memories to be where it was supposed to be. I was still set in this world of familiarity, but that did little to bring me more than a little comfort.

I had returned to a small two story home that I considered fondly with what was supposed to be my bedroom at the top of the stairs; pictures of a time not to far past littered the wall on a board and when I had returned I had taken them in with confusion. My father, Charlie, the man with the moustache, had seen me and had walked in and placed his arm around my shoulders carefully going through them as if explaining to a child.

He pointed to a curly haired blonde woman, my mother, a group of beautiful men and women, the Cullen's, friends from high school…Edward. He followed through each explanation with a pointing gesture toward each photo.

I glared at each photo, frustration pulling. Finally he pointed to one photo, slightly crinkled at the edges. Jacob. My father paused and I stepped forward to run my fingers lightly over the grinning faces that stared back at me. This Jacob was lying on the floor literally cracking up with a large arm wrapped around my waist as I laughed what looked like hysterically trying to get away. The photo looked so happy, I was tempted to smile.

"Do you remember Jacob a little bit Bella?" Charlie's voice pulled me from my thoughts as I dropped my hand away from the photo. I turned to him and smiled slightly. "Not really, I just was admiring how happy we looked." His smile didn't reach his eyes when he replied. "He's a real good kid, cares about you a lot. You've been friends since you guys were kids." I nodded. I could tell. I'd had a variety of visitor since my return, but his visits always seem to stick in my mind.

He was so easy to be around, almost as easy as breathing. If I wasn't so confused I'd say I had a slight crush on Jacob Black. One thing I did know without a doubt was that there was an almost tangible dislike between him and another one of my visitors. Edward Cullen.

His visits were as frequent as Jacobs. I didn't understand my relationship with either of them. I mean I could get Jacobs to a point; we had apparently been friends for a long time. My dad had made a comment that we had made mud pies together. 'Mud pie huh?' But Edwards's relationship with me made no sense. We had apparently gone to high school together, but other than that what kept his interest in me failed to be comprehended.

When I had come home, I had taken the longest of showers, washing what felt like months of grime from my body. I had gone to the mirror, slick with steam and wiped my hand across it to see my reflection. I didn't recognize my self in the least, but I familiarized the face staring back at me. Long dark hair that flowed to my waist tinted the slightest bit of red, pale flawless skin that was slightly creamy, and then large dark eyes that looked to large on my face.

I would admit I was pretty. But average at best. My figure was slender and curve with maturity, but I wasn't a supermodel. I looked in my closet after my brief study of myself and pulled out worn jeans and a purple flannel shirt. My clothes didn't even look special.

So why on earth was the well dress, well groomed, and intelligent Edward Cullen a part of my life, and deeply ingrained it seemed. 'This is ridiculous; I wish they'd just tell me who they all were.' I growled.

Per the doctor's orders, everyone walked around eggshell around me. Other than my father and mother, everyone was deemed as 'This is your friend Bella.' It was frustrating and I had wanted to scream a number of times. 'Okay, I get they are my friends, but what kind of friends, how close are we, what are some of our histories.' But noo!

So weeks had past with many visitors, their faces blurring together and a sense of helplessness I had no control over. Not to mention being beyond cooped up. I was going stir crazy. "Bella, there's someone down here to see you!" I made a frustrated noise in the back of my throat. Would it kill these people to give me a moment to myself? I sighed and stood from my prone position on my bed. 'Guess I have nothing better to do.' A voice responded in the back of my head. 'Not true, there's a copy of Pride and Prejudice calling your name on your desk.'

I walked down my stairs with a bit of temper and I guess I should have known better because the next thing I knew I was falling. I sucked in a gasp and I readied myself for impact, eyes closing tight. But then there was nothing but heat surrounding me. "God Bella, be careful, I can't always be here to catch you!" a deep baritone voice laughed and pulled me closer. I looked up and met the friendly dark gaze of Jacob. I blushed deeply and dryly laughed. "I'm supposed to be accident extraordinaire though; wouldn't that be bad for my reputation?" He laughed again, and I tilted my head at the nice feeling it gave me.

"Sure sure, but if you wanna bust out of here, you've got to at least give the persona of being normal Bells." He set me down on my feet and I felt my body jolt at the thought of what he just said. "When you say bust out of here, do you mean go some where other than the grocery store?" He grinned, a smile I had only ever seen him grace me and I felt some excitement pulse through my body. "Yep, but you have to be careful, otherwise I don't think Charlie will lift the house arrest."

I felt myself nod quickly, barely containing myself as I followed him in the kitchen where Charlie was reading the paper and sipping coffee. "Hey Jacob, how's it going?" Charlie said as he shook Jacob's hand from his seated position. "Good, good…Just been real busy around the rez and with work. I finally got the day off and I was wondering if you might let Bella and I go out for a bit." "Well, I don't know-" "She'll be perfectly safe with me-" "Jake its not that-"

"Dad please!" I heard myself sort of whine. Charlie and Jacob both turned to look at me with a degree of surprise. Charlie got up from the dinner table and walked carefully over to me, looking me over and placing his hand on my head. "Bella, are you sure you feel up to it, you've only been out of the hospital for a couple weeks, and you don't know what going out is going to do to you." I gave him a flat look and he held up his hands in deference. "Alright, but you come home if you feel the slightest bit off, I mean it Bella." He turned to look at Jacob then. "And you take good care of her Jake, I know you always do, but it goes without saying that I am trusting you with her safety." Jake grinned and nodded. "Yes sir."

I wanted to jump a little in excitement, but managed to contain it as Jacob grabbed my hand and lead me towards the door. "Call Billy, if you need to get a hold of us!" he sort of shouted as the door was opened and then we were headed towards an old car. He opened the door to me and closed it as he ran to the driver's side. Before he could open it however, I saw him tense and his body visibly shook. I leaned down so I could see his face and saw his face set in what could be deemed a snarl, his darker eyes glaring into the forest.

I don't know why but every protective instinct rose within me at that moment. 'Weird.' I leaned over and grasped his hand in a silent comforting motion. He startled and glanced towards me, I smiled and tugged a bit and his eyes softened. "Alright miss impatient. Lets go." And then he was fitting his too large body in the car. "You okay?" I asked after we had made our way onto the rode. The sky was cloudy and it looked like rain. But then again, from what little experience I had it always looked like that here.

He sighed and grabbed my hand again, squeezing briefly and nodding. "Sorry Bells, I just get caught up in my thoughts sometime, nothing to worry about." I squeezed his hand back. "Well we're supposed to be really good friends, you can always talk to me Jake." He chuckled and nodded, his eyes focused on the road.

I couldn't help but feel this hand holding thing was normal for us, natural. My hand fit in his comfortably, with an ease. But then we always touched when we were together, a way to broadcast affection I suppose. 'Do friends do this? Is he more than my friend, he has to be.' All my memories may have been locked in Pandora's Box, but I still retained my world knowledge and our ease with each other was some thing I just couldn't look over. I wanted to ask, but then I may ruin our deep bond. 'Not possible.' A voice whispered to me.

"You okay Bells?" Jacobs's voice brought me back from my internal thoughts. His eyes concerned and deep. I nodded and redirected. "So where are we going? I can't tell you how awesome you are for busting my out of the pin." He grinned and focused on the road again pulling onto a dirt road. "La Push. My home, we're going to the beach."

"Oh cool, it's the reservation you always talk about?" I said as we came to a stop at an older looking cottage of sorts. A man I remember visiting me at the house wheeling onto the porch. 'Billy? Jakes dad right?' I reminded myself. Jake quickly got out of the car and ran to the other side to open my door, grasping my hand to help me out. "Well isn't this a sight for sore eyes, how's it going Bella?" Billy asked as we met him at the porch. I leaned down to hug him; feeling like it was a natural occurrence. "I'm good, still no new developments I'm afraid." As I rapt my fist on the side of my head self consciously. "All in good time, hunny, there's got to be some reason you're not remembering." He said quietly but sweetly and I couldn't help but feel there was some cryptic message in that sentence.

"Alright Dad, Bella and I are going down to first beach for a bit, so if Charlie calls, that where we are." Jacob said as he tugged my hand towards the woods. 'I guess he didn't like what his dad said.' I tightened my hand on his and lengthened my stride to keep up with his much longer ones. He chuckled and let go of my hand, pausing in front on me. Leaning down slightly, he gestured with head and held his hands out by his sides. "Get on shorty." I snorted, but jumped on, laughing when he jumped a bit settle me on his back. Wrapping my arms around his neck, I rested my chin on his shoulder as we trekked on.

My thoughts again drifted to us. 'What is it about us.' "Jake?" he glanced at me over his shoulder. "Yes Bells." He slowed our pace a bit as if he knew that we were about to discuss something important. "Can you explain us?" He stiffened under my touch and I felt myself soothing him, by running my hands through his short hair. "What do you mean Bella, you know I can't really explain everything…that's what the doc said." He pushed his head into my hand a bit, almost revealing in innocent affection.

Did I ever touch him before? Did I love him at one point? I felt like I had. "I know, I know…I just-I want to know where we stood, what were we?" I asked quietly, slightly afraid of his answer. His hands squeezed my thighs, comforting me. He always knew what I needed too. 'I don't understand this.' "What do you think we were Bella?" His body was tense, waiting what felt like punishment. I struggled to get down off his back and he released me. I walked out in front of him and really looked at him.

His shoulders hunched a little, but then he sighed and straightened to his normal height. I walked slowly towards him, reaching up to run my hands over his darker skin. His eyes shut in pleasure and what looked like a little pain and I scrunched up my face with displease. He shouldn't ever have to feel pain. "I don't know Jake, I really don't. I just know that there's something about you that calls me. I feel like there are these strings holding you and me together. It's so weird, but when everyone's faces blur in the background, yours stands out. I don't know how to feel about it, because we're just friends right?"

My voice broke at the last part and he stared at me in a little bit of bewilderment. He reached out carefully and pushed my hair from my face, then caressed the side of my cheek so softly. I continued to watch him as his eyes crinkled at the side and he smiled a little. "Yes Bella we're friends." My face fell a little and I went to step away from his gentle touch, embarrassment filling me. Only he followed, and leaned down slightly, both hands now cupping my face in his hands. "We were and are friends Bells, but-"

"But-" I whispered back as I felt my eyes drift closed, as his face moved closer to mine. "But…we were always meant to be so much more-"and then he was kissing me and I felt like I had finally awakened. One hand remained on my face while the other drifted into my long hair and I stood taller to wrap my hand around his neck. Then I was spinning as images of us on a mountain, him kissing me and me kissing him back with desperation. Those images morph to our future, me holding our child while he walked toward me a young boy at his side with his face and my eyes. I gasped and pulled away.

We stared at him and he stared at me, our breath heavy and our hands still clutching at each other.

"Was I-Jake? Was I in love with you?"

OH! Cliffy! HAHA Let me know what ya'll think…and review!


	5. So many things

I own only my thoughts, and even then it's questionable.

So many things

Chapter 5

Dark eyes widened beyond what I had ever seen on his beautiful face and he took in a deep breath and gazed at me. It was all I could do to return it, my brain rushing with the images I had seen. Was it a memory I had seen or just a vivid dream. He tightened his grip on my body, pulling me closer than what seem possible and a gasp escaped me, his hot body surrounded my cooler one and he gripped me.

"I don't know Bella, we really never got that far…" he whispered in the confines of my shoulder where he had burrowed his head. I clutched his head tighter to me in what only could be a desperate embrace. He acted like I would pull away from him at any second. 'There's so much I don't understand.'

"What-what do you mean, this feels so familiar, so right? How could it-"A choked laugh sounded from him and he shook he head as best he could in his position. "Bells, I really can't say much more. But just know that I have always and will always love you." I was stunned and pulled back to look at him, his eyes met mine and I felt tears cloud my vision. "Did I do something, Jake I'm so confused…" I begged him to tell me, I needed to know how I could have ignored something so perfect. The way we meshed was impossible.

Again he shook his head, releasing me and grabbing my hand as he pulled me to the beach that was only 10 feet ahead. "I can't hunny, that's something that just has to come back to you in time. And if not it has to be a decision you make." I pulled back instantly and glared at him. There was something going on that I couldn't grasp. He turned to me, an eyebrow raise, and his gaze questioning me. "I wish you would all stop treating me like a child! I can handle whatever it is. Just please-"I dropped off and grasped my self around my middle, trying to hold myself together.

It was like a switched flipped then and I was being cradled again by the addicting heat that was Jacob. "No, no, no Bells, you don't have to do that, I'm right here, I've got you." And then I was sobbing. Huge body wracking sobs that shook my body and I could only cling to him. He shushed me and petted my hair gently, whisper sweet words of how he would always take care of me in ear. It only made me cry harder. This man, this honest, wonderful man loved me. I could feel it in every motion he made, every word he spoke, and I couldn't for the life of me remember him. How horrible did that make me?

When my sobs had quieted, he bent slightly and hooked his hand under my knee and then we were moving. I could hear the waves and gazed out towards the waters. The sun was setting; seemed impossible we had been gone that long and I curled tighter in his arms, soaking in the heat that was Jacob. I stared out at the swirling colors of the light of the sun and had a slight epiphany that I had to voice out loud. "You know what you remind me of Jake?" I said quietly and he hummed back just as quietly, his eyes watching the sky like mine were. "The sun." His body trembled and I wondered what if I said something wrong, but then his lips gently brushed over forehead and he gave a little chuckle. "I know hunny. I know."

He was then turning back to the path we had taken earlier that day, placing me in the car and a comfortable silence engulfed us as we made the trip back to my house. When we had parked and the engine was turned off, he turned to me and whispered a soft goodnight, I was assaulted with the feeling of lose once again. "Will you come in for a bit?" He smiled and nodded as he got out of the car and opened mine, guiding me to the door. "Bella? Is that that you-oh hey Jake did you guys have a good time today?" Charlie said walking into the room and instantly making his way over to me.

"We had a great time Dad, we went to the beach and just hung out. Then watched the sunset, it was great to get out of the house." Charlie grinned a bit at Jake and I arched my eyebrow at the silent communication between the two men. A knock at the door had me redirecting my attention however, as I made my way back to the front door. Opening it I was surprised to see Edward standing there. "Oh hey Edward, how are you? Come on in."

He smiled sweetly and glided in the way he only seemed to do. "Bella, how are you today? I stopped by earlier, but you were out." His voice changed a bit with the last word and I wondered why. "Yeah, Jake took me out today. I can't tell you how great it was to get out of the house and back into the real world!" He laughed along with me, though his seemed slightly forced. I turned to go back towards the living room but ran straight into the wall that was Jake. "Jake!" I smacked his arm slightly to convey my irritation at my klutz attack and he grinned. "Black." Edwards voice carried, and then the grin disappeared with a look of controlled annoyance. "Nice to see you again Cullen."

"I could say the same. Have a good day?"

"Great thanks."

Verbal warfare was never an expertise of mine, but it looked like the two would happily tear each other to shreds given ample opportunity. But I was in the middle literally and needed to diffuse the situation fast. I looked at Charlie and he seemed to be rubbing his hands together in excitement. 'Oh my god dad really?'

"Yeah the sunlight was great for Bella to be out in. I know how much you hate it though, so I took her out for some good old fashioned vitamin d."

"I'm sure that's what you had in mind when you took her out for the entire day down at La Push of all places."

Pinching the bridge of my nose in frustration, I decided now was a good time as I gently laid my hand on Jakes arm and squeezed. He immediately looked down at me and his entire persona changed. "What do you need Bells?" His large hand moving to rest lightly on the small of my back. The hair on my skin rose at the simple gesture. "I just wanted to tell you thank you for getting me out for the day. I'm exhausted though, so would both of you mind-"I trailed off not really wanting to be so brash about them leaving.

Edwards's voice made me pause and look over at him. His face was cool and collective, but for some reason I could tell that was the last thing he was. "Yes, you should rest after exerting yourself so much today Bella, would you mind if I dropped by tomorrow?" I felt my self nodding before I could stop my self and reflected that again Pride and Prejudice would be collecting dust. "Mr. Swan, would you mind if Bella and I go out tomorrow?" Charlie looked a little wary, not at all like he had when Jake had approached him with the idea. "I don't know Edward, the only reason I let her go out with Jake was because Billy was there." Not true Charlie. But nice save anyways.

I felt bad so I opened my mouth to put my two cense. "Well I don't want to go out for the entire day tomorrow, because I'm pretty tired right now, but maybe we can go catch some dinner or a movie?" Jake immediately let out what could be described as a growl and I glanced at him out of the corner of my eye. His gaze was locked on Edward, and I felt that any moment, he would burst. 'What a weird way to describe someone's emotional outburst.' Edward smile faintly, and nodded. "Dinner won't be necessary but a movie or something could be interesting."

"Cool, then I'll call you tomorrow then. Night everyone!" and then I was moving up the stairs quickly. I was running, I knew that, but I couldn't stop the feelings of being closed in on. I made it to my room and threw myself on my bed, burrowing myself in my pillows. The day's emotions catching up with me quickly and I felt exhausting creeping up on me. The next thing I knew I was asleep.

_I was standing in a forest, blackness creeping along my vision. The wind blew uncontrollably, the trees moving with its force. I was alone, but I could feel eyes watching me. It was unnerving and my heart beat raced in my chest. _

"_Isabella." _

"_Bella"_

"_Bells"_

_Three voices sounded in quick succession and I spun towards each one turning in a quick circle. "Who's there? Show yourself!" I shouted, my breath sounding loud in my ears. _

"_Isabeeeeella."_

"_Bella!"_

"_Bells!"_

_I spun again and collapsed on the cold ground, putting my face in the cup of my hands, sobbing dryly. "I don't know who you are! Come out please!" I pleaded and lifted my face from my hands when the landscape shifted closer and I heard the thick forest rustle with an entities movement. From my left side a pale long hair man shifted forward, his eyes a deep red color, his skin pale and his gaze calculating. "Isabella." He drew out my name and I feared him the moment I looked into his eyes. _

_A gasp tore my throat as the forest again shifted, this time to my right. 'Edward?' He too shifted forward. His gaze pleading and a bit of moonlight broke through the heavy over brush of the trees setting his skin in to a sparkling mass of marble perfection. "Bella." He begged. My gaze lingered and I shook my head, tears finally gushing from my eyes. _

_I jumped when the brush shuffled and I saw Jacob step forward, his form shaking and blurring. "Bells!" I reached for him, from my seated position. "Jake!" And then his body distorted and a large russet wolf stood in his place, head lowered in submission. I drew back afraid as his head rose up and a howl sounded from his throat. Then his gaze met mine, and I was drawn into the dark eyes that belonged to Jacob Black. "I don't understand, why?" I asked him and he looked at the two figures with bared teeth standing on my either side. _

_Two hisses issued and I watched in slow motion as the two figures flew at either, and then I was surrounded in heat and fur as a furious snarl vibrated through my body. "You know the rules Edward!" _

"_She will be turned, you saw it yourself!"_

_I clung to the fur bracketing my body and looked up into the eyes I knew as friend and protector. He nodded and curled around me. 'I will protect you, even from yourself.' I felt him speak to me. _

_BELLA! BELLA? ISABELLA!_

My throat hurt. That was my first conscious thought; the second was the Charlie was shaking me rather fiercely. "What the hell?" I gasped, my voice rasping. Charlie was hugging me tightly then and I curled an uncertain arm shakily around him. "Its okay sweetheart, you're awake now. You were screaming in your sleep again, scared the shit out of me." He mumbled. "Again?" I murmured sleepily. "Don't worry about it, go back to sleep, it's like three in the morning." I nodded tiredly and was out before you could count to ten, my dreams silent.

When I awoke again, a weak sunlight was filtering in through the curtains and I rolled to look at my clock. Red numbers blared 11:56 am back at me and I flashed back to the red eyes in my dreams. 'That dream was freaky shit.' I stumbled out of bed to the bathroom, quickly shucking my clothes and turning the shower on, water hot and almost painful. I stood leaning again the cold tile, reflecting. 'It seemed so real, even the part that Jake was a wolf…seemed natural, like nothing out of the ordinary.'

I revealed in the heat of the water. My head hurt I realized, a pounding kind of ache. Pinching the bridge of my nose to see if it would help, I gave up and turned the water off. Grabbing the towel on the wrack and wrapping it around myself. I made my way back to my room silently and dressed in a pair of warm sweat pants and a tank, and then made my way down the stairs. "Dad?" I was met with silence as I made my way into the kitchen. I saw a note pasted to the black of the refrigerator and pulled it down.

'Bella, so sorry to leave you with out saying goodbye, but I had to go down to the station for a while. Some serious things have happened the last 24 hours and I was needed. Call if you need anything. Don't stay out all day either, Edward already called too. Love, Dad'

I snorted at the note. Got to love my dad, short and to the point with a mix of fatherly protection but trust. 'Hope everything is okay. He said it was serious, and it had to be for him to leave after everything.' That was one thing I had learned about Charlie after becoming reacquainted, he definitely loved me, but was serious and to the point. I had talked to my mother about four days ago, and my brain felt like it was swirling by the time I got off the phone with her. I was definitely more like Charlie.

I walked around the quiet kitchen in thought, grabbing juice and a muffin, munching in silence. The phone ringing almost made me drop the damn blueberry goodness too. I lifted the phone from the station and looked at the caller ID.

CULLEN, E.

Impatient much? I thought he had already called and my dad had dealt with it. Oh well. I hit the talk button. "Hello, Bella speaking?" I said with as little annoyance as I could. So kill me, I was cranky when I just woke up. "Hello Bella, did you just wake up? I hope your still wanting to go out today for our date." I paused, my eyes widening at the implications of that word. 'Date?'

"Um, yea sorry about that. I didn't sleep to well last night, so I guess I slept in. I'm still cool with going out through, want to meet downtown around maybe around three?"

"Three? So three or so hours from now? And I could come and pick you up of course."

I felt bad when I realized he had wanted to spend more time with me. But I just couldn't shake this feeling I got around him. Like he was stalking prey, and I was said prey.

"Um, it's really no problem, I'd like to drive anyway, don't really get to do it that much with how protective every ones become. But yeah, want to meet me at the Newton's store around three?"

I bit my lip and he kind of sigh over the line. "Of course Bella, I can't wait." Score.

"Alright, see you then! Talk to you later. Bye."

I hung up the phone with a grateful thunk and went back to the business of eating my delicious muffin. I mean yum, who knew I could cook like this. Every one said I was great at it, but I didn't believe them until I had decided to try my luck with the muffin I was now demolishing. I leaned again the counter, my thoughts again drifting to my dream. 'Edward sparkling huh, I have a very vivid imagination.' Kind of want to share my thoughts with someone. But who…I didn't really have a close relationship with anyone other than Jake. 'Jake! Yes, perfect! He'll totally get a kick out of it.'

I reached for the phone and quickly dialed his number from memory. I stopped. Wait memory. The phone was ringing as I realized it and someone picked up. "Hello, this is Jacob." I couldn't speak. "Hello?" A small noise escaped my throat as I desperately tried to speak. "Bella? Is that you hunny, are you okay?" Again I tried and then I coughed. "Sorry, I just remembered something and I was in a little shock. I'm here." He paused and spoke. "Don't scare me like that; you remembered something, that's great hunny, what was it." I smiled. "Your phone number." He laughed. "I'm flattered! So what's up, you just get up, you still sound sleepy."

"Yea, I was actually calling to tell you about that. I had this crazy dream last night! So I didn't sleep to well." He paused again. "Really, was it a nightmare…you used to have some really bad ones?"

I did? "That must have been what Charlie meant. I woke up screaming. But I mean it was so real. You, Edward, and this strange guy were there and he sparkled and you turned into a wolf."

I expected laughter or something other then the silence that reined over the line. "Jake?"

"A wolf huh? What did I look like?" This conversation was strange. "You were this really pretty red brown, and I didn't know it was you at first, and then I saw your eyes. I knew I didn't have to be afraid then." There was a clutter noise on the other line and then his voice was strained on the other end. "Bella, I have to go, but I'll talk to you later okay?" A growl sounded some where in the back round. "Okay, and hey Jake-" "Yea Bella-" I thought back to the night at the beach. "I think I love you too." I hung up quickly. 'I can't believe I just said that, can we say word vomit!'

The hours passed quickly, Charlie had called to check on me, and before I could really believe it, it was time to meet Edward. I drove with my heads in the clouds all the way there and saw him leaning against the nice Volvo that was his car. I turned off my car and walked toward him; he met me half way and wrapped his arm around me in a gentlemanly way. "How are you today Bella, what have you been doing." He asked as he led me toward the theater. "Not much, just resting…I had some strange dreams last night, didn't really get to much sleep."

"Dreams? Really. What were they about." I thought about answering him but I remembered Jakes reaction and chose to just blow them off. "Cant really even remember." I said blandly and he looked a little hurt. I chose to ignore that and we purchased out tickets for some British film. "Sorry to hear that." Silence reined around us, and I couldn't help but feel awkward around him. I mean don't get me wrong, Jacob was beautiful in his own right and moved with an ease I was jealous of, but I didn't feel like I was anything but myself around him. Edward however was flat out suave and sophisticated. 'Did I really just think suave?'

We sat down and watched the film and it felt like hours. I felt strange with Edwards arm resting around my back, it was cold and hard. 'Was he my boyfriend then? Did I leave Jake for him and that's why they hate each other so much?' Sure felt that way. How could I have left Jacob though?

When the movie was over we walked silently over to my truck and I smiled at Edward. "Well I appreciate the movie; maybe we'll do it again some time." He nodded and I could feel there was something else he wanted to say. "Yes, I enjoyed our time together Bella." He stepped closer and went to open my door for me. As I started to climb in he grasped my arm and the next thing I knew he was kissing me lightly.

Again the swirl of colored pictures filtered through my brain. Him bracing himself on a large bolder, I trapped against it. Us laying in a meadow, starring at each other, then the sun filtering through the clouds and his skin erupting in what looked like diamonds. I pulled back, startled. "I have to go…bye"

And then I was starting my truck and throwing it into reverse, then speeding off in the direction of my house. I was hyperventilating I was sure. My thoughts in chaos. I had never felt fear so strong. 'What in the hell is going on here?'

Well slightly longer chapter. I'm planning on next chapter being in Jacob POV…two in Bella's and then one in Jakes is my plan. Hope you guys like it. I'm so in love with this idea I have I can't stop writing, I would really love more feed back though. Reviews feed my creative plot bunnies. ;)


	6. Testing the Waters

I do not own Twilight yo.

Hope you guys enjoy!

Chapter 6

Testing the Waters

The days had passed quickly. It seemed like everything that had happened the last month was just turning out to be a vivid nightmare. But when I visited Bella-well that swiftly gave me a reality check. I tried my best to visit her every other day, but between the pack, my dad, and trying to graduate through my online classes, it was really tricky.

I was also trying to give her a bit a space; she seemed to be a bit annoyed at all her visitors. Between me, the Cullen's, the bit-Edward, and her friends from school, she looked about ready to throttle someone and I was not going to be the lucky candidate.

'Would you please try to focus on something other than the leech lover.' Leah's voice broadcasted through the pack link. 'Why don't you mind your own thoughts then.' I growled back. It was always irritating patrolling with Leah, she could never leave well enough alone. "Yea, well I'm not exactly ecstatic being stuck with you either lover boy.' She sniffed and turned to scratch her ear with her hind leg. I just ignored her. 'So she really doesn't remember any thing?' She asked with an air of indifference, but not well enough to keep the genuine curiosity out of her tone.

I cocked my head at her then. 'Are you actually concerned for Bella?' She laid down. 'Don't be silly, I don't care one way or the other.' And because she had become so damned good at blocking the pack mind, I truly didn't know if that was the case. 'Yea-she can't even remember her dad. I mean she knows stuff like how to drive or reading, things like that, but faces and names, relationships-'

I gave pause at that thought. Leah also went silent. We let the noise of the forest surround us as we both pondered what was on our minds without the other interjecting in at every tidbit of information. 'Look Jake, just be careful-I know your real close to her, but don't open yourself back up for heartbreak, because I don't think I can deal with another one of your renegade missions. That shit sucked when you left, I had to report to Sam…' she trailed off and stood, shaking her fur out. 'Just be aware that she could remember at any point and run right back to the leeches. Come on our shift is over; I hear Paul and Seth coming this way.'

As I stood she joined my flank and we started running towards my house. 'I get it Leah, I just hope she doesn't, and maybe she can live like a normal human for once.' She gave a choking growl of a laugh. 'So that means she doesn't even get to be with you then?' My heart stuttered a bit. Is that what that meant? Before I could give that comment more of a thought, I felt Paul and Seth join the pack mind. I shifted quickly before I had to hear more about my not so real relationship with Bella. I leaned down to untie the pants from my leg and slipped them on, Leah already dressed making her way in the other direction with a mock salute.

"I'll talk to you guys later, alls quiet out there. See you later." And with that I was walking towards the porch where Billy sat. "Hey son, how was patrol? Any new news?" he asked as he wheeled closer to me. I just sat down with a tired sigh. "Everything was cool, it was a quiet night." We sat in a comfortable silence for awhile and then he spoke again. "Talked to Charlie today, he said he think Bella's about to go on a mass murdering spree if she doesn't get out and get some fresh air."

I pondered that for a moment. "Maybe I'll head over there and see if I can bring her down to the rez for awhile. Couldn't hurt to try. But then again, Charlie's been pretty friendly with riffle lately. I don't think I've ever seen that thing shine like that in the entire time he's had it." We both shared a laugh at Charlie's protective instincts going into over drive.

"True, but I don't blame him. If something like that had happened to any one of you kids, especially the girls, I can't say I wouldn't be the exact same way. But Charlie's got a soft spot for you, and I'm sure you'd like to spend some time with Bella." He got that twinkle in his eyes like he was up to no good and I studied him a bit harder. "Dad, you know it could only be a matter of time before she remembers…" I said biting the cold bullet of fear the thought gave me. His grin dropped and his eyes crinkled in thought and wisdom. "Jake, son I know you and I know me. We're a lot alike, us two." He paused and looked at me with a small smile. "I know how we care and most of all how we love and it's always been forever. Just like how your mom is always going to be forever, I fear that's what Bella's going to be for you."

It was so rare when dad talked about mom, I could see the old pain surface as well as the joy that the thought of her brought to him. 'Is that what I look like when I think of Bella?'

"Son, I know she could remember, but I can't help but feel this is a chance to rectify the wrong doings that the cold ones have brought upon you and her. You have the opportunity to change things, to make things right. For you and Bella to be together, all I'm saying is to take that chance if you believe she's it for you." He nodded as if assuring himself that what he said was truth and I was floored.

Don't get me wrong. I had more than enough time to think about these things myself. The day she had awakened from her sleep and we had realized her memory was missing, so many possibilities had run through my head. 'Especially when she whispered your name.' That in its self is what had me reining myself in. She quite simply still had known it was my touch, even through unconsciousness. 'Would she have known if it was Edward?' God I hated my brain.

"I want to believe that dad, I really do. There's a huge part of me that just wants to jump in head first, but there's another part of me wondering if there's jagged rocks underneath the waters. I've never felt so strongly for someone and when she got back with that leech-" I paused, an old pain making itself apparent in my chest. "It killed me inside; I felt like I'd been ripped apart and left bleeding. If I thought for one moment that she didn't feel anything for me I'd be able to walk away, but when she left-when we kissed-I knew she felt it too, she was just too blinded by everything else to really act on it."

We sat in a tense silence as I got my feelings under control. I'd never really opened up about this to anyone, and it felt raw and heated. "I not saying to jump in Jacob" He paused and I heard the wheel chair shuffle and felt his hand on my shoulder. "I'm just saying to test the waters." I looked up at him a little stunned and he grinned. "There's a game coming on though, so I'll talk at you later son. Tell Charlie I said Hi." Then proceeded to wheel himself in through the front door. I chuckled, crazy old man.

I felt a bit lighter as I grabbed my keys off the end table by the front door and made my way towards the rabbit. As I drove to the Swan residence, I couldn't help but feel the butterflies making there presence known in my stomach and I scolded myself at being such a wimp. 'Really Jake?'

As I pulled into the drive way of their house, I had to stifle my instincts away at the sickly sweet stench of the Cullen's that populated the air around the perimeter. I still couldn't quite wrap my head around the fact that they were still around. Bella had a new chance at life with out the influences of the supernatural and it just seemed like the right thing for them to walk away and leave her be. Sure that was a some what biased feeling, but still.

Charlie answered the door after I knocked a suspicious look on his face. "Oh heya Jake, come on in." The look passes as he let me in and I relaxed as Bella's clean scent passed through my nose. "Bella, there's someone down here to see you!" he shouted up the stairs as he walked back to the kitchen. I heard her grumbling something as she stomped down the stairs. About six stairs down she lost her balance and began tumbling downward. I jumped forward and caught her, her soft body falling into mine.

"God Bella, be careful, I can't always be here to catch you!" I laughed as she blushed hotly and I smiled. I would be always be there, if she let me, but I wasn't about to voice that out loud, she had to be confused enough without my interference. Edward made sure he was here as much I was, like he was trying to stake his claim. 'Claiming doesn't mean anything if she doesn't remember you douche bag.'

"I'm supposed to be accident extraordinaire though; wouldn't that be bad for my reputation?" she laughed dryly standing and brushing the imaginary wrinkles from her clothes. I grinned and ruffled her hair. "Sure sure, but if you wanna bust out of here, you've got to at least give the persona of being normal Bells." I drawled, acting completely nonchalant. Her eyes got wide and she leaned forward. "When you say bust out of here, do you mean go some where other than the grocery store?" she said in a conspired voice. My grin widened and I nodded.

"Yep, but you have to be careful, otherwise I don't think Charlie will lift the house arrest." She looked like she wanted to bounce on our way to the kitchen and I couldn't help but appreciate the uninhibited Bella. 'This is how she should be.' We walked in and I shook Charlie's hand, exchanging some pleasantries. When I got to the point asking to take Bella out for a bit, I didn't know if him liking me was going to work. Bella quickly surprised us both though, we she outright begged to go.

"Alright, but you come home if you feel the slightest bit off, I mean it Bella." He turned to look at me, giving me a slightly stern look. "And you take good care of her Jake, I know you always do, but it goes without saying that I am trusting you with her safety." I nodded, unable to keep the smile off my face as I ushered Bella to the door. "Yes sir." I opened the door, and as an after thought, I mentioned calling my dad if he needed us.

Then we were rushing to the car, like two regular teenagers that just got ungrounded and were getting out of the house for the first time in months. She giggled and I was reminded why I called her Bells. I opened the rabbits door for her and shut it moving to the other side. I was so excited I almost didn't notice the scent of decayed flesh.

"You'll do best to remember that she belongs to us Black. This is just a passing storm, and when the rains are gone, you'll be washed away from her thoughts just like before." Edwards voice came from the forest and I held in the truly vicious snarl that wanted to escape my chest. 'She may not remember us now, but if she does remember in the future then she'll remember what happened now, and I will fight for her, for us, and there's nothing you can do about that leech.' I felt the pulse of my blood running hotly through me and fought the urge to phase.

A slightly chilled but still warm hand grasped arm and distracted me quickly. Bella smiled at me from inside the car and I felt the rage fade. "Alright miss impatient. Let's go." I said as I climbed into the rabbit and pulled out of the drive, turning onto the main road. "You okay?" she asked quietly and I reached for her hand, she squeezed back.

She used to pull away from so much as a touch, but now it seemed she sought my affection just as much as I craved hers. "Sorry Bells, I just get caught up in my thoughts sometime, nothing to worry about." I said a little moody. The leech still getting under my skin. She squeezed my hand again, gaining my attention. "Well, we're supposed to be really good friends, you can always talk to me Jake." She had lost a lot of the selfishness that she had used to have, something that I to this day blame on the Cullen's influence. Bella was too good and shy to be one of them. She was always trying to live in there shadow.

She had been silent for a moment and I peeked out the corner of my eye at her. She looked thoughtful and a bit perplexed. "You okay Bells?" I asked before I could stop myself. She blushed a bit and nodded, redirecting before I could wonder what that blush was about. "So where are we going? I can't tell you how awesome you are for busting my out of the pin." I laughed a bit and mentioned the rez and beach. She seemed truly excited and bounced a bit impatiently in the seat.

We got to the house and my dad was back on the porch, reading the paper, drinking a beer. I opened the door for Bella and she walked up to Billy like how she used to, hugging him. If I didn't know better, I'd say she had never forgotten anything. I focused on the conversation at hand. "I'm good, still no new developments I'm afraid." She self consciously rapped her knuckles on the side of her head and I felt a pang of sadness and relief all at once. "All in good time, hunny, there's got to be some reason you're not remembering." My dad said with an air of mystery that had me shaking my head and pulling her towards the woods. "Alright Dad, Bella and I are going down to first beach for a bit, so if Charlie calls, that where we are." I said over my shoulder. Bella looked a little puzzled but lengthened her strides to keep up with mine.

I didn't want to tire her out. She was still recovering, though looking at her you couldn't tell. The only scar from her run in with the vampire was covered by the dark green of her flannel shirt. I stopped and leaned down, offering her my back. "Get on shorty." I laughed and she jumped on, giggling as I lifted her higher. It was so easy being with her like this. Natural and easy. She rested her head on my shoulder, in deep thought. I could almost hear the gears turning in her head. "Jake?"

"Yes Bells." I slowed, feeling the seriousness of the conversation about to pass. She started and then stopped and I continued to trek on letting her collect her thoughts. "Can you explain us?" she asked quietly and I tensed. 'How do answer that? Well I'm your wannabe boyfriend, but you picked the bloodsucking douche bag?' Some how I didn't think that would go over well. She ran her hands through my hair and I leaned into the touch I had never had been given, but had so desperately craved. "What do you mean Bella, you know I can't really explain everything…that's what the doc said." I settled for acting stupid. Maybe she'd drop it and play with my hair some more. "I know, I know…I just-I want to know where we stood, what were we?" She said twirling a bit of my hair around her small finger.

She sounded so nervous, so I squeezed her thighs to comfort her. 'Bad idea.' I could feel the smooth muscle constrict in my hands and it was easy to picture us in a different position. 'Okay redirect here Jake.' "What do you think we were Bella?" I asked and then wanted to slap myself. I readied myself for the rejection that was so normal in the Jacob and Bella saga. She made a small noise of protest and wiggled, trying to get down. I released her and she walked out in front of me, looking at me, studying me. It was hard not to feel a bit self conscious when the girl you've loved forever is dissecting you with her amazing eyes.

'Come on, man up, you want her to see a little boy or a man?' I had hutched a little in her inspection, but then straightened and gazed back at her thoughtfully. She seemed to like that, because she stepped forward and reached up to caress my face. I leaned in eagerly and it felt like torture, because there was really no resolution.

"I don't know Jake, I really don't. I just know that there's something about you that calls me. I feel like there are these strings holding you and me together. It's so weird, but when everyone's faces blur in the background, yours stands out. I don't know how to feel about it, because we're just friends right?" I stared at her in wonder as she described what I had always felt her. 'And she used to argue with me about her feelings.'

I couldn't stop myself if I tried as I reached down to touch her cheek, running my finger down the smoothness of her milky white complexion. "Yes Bella we're friends." I heard myself mumble and she pulled away, her face already breaking out in a light blush that was so very becoming on her. I followed, never willing to have her get away again."We were and are friends Bells, but-" I cupped her face in my hands as I leaned in, a small part in me remembering how the last time I initiated a kiss went. Her eyes were dropping and she whispered back. "But-?"

I pulled her closer and whispered back just as quietly. "But…we were always meant to be so much more-" and then I over took her mouth in a gentle kiss. I was in some sort of dream, I had to be. The last time we had kissed on the mountain top, it was all passion and fear. It was something completely different to be taking your time fully exploring the feel and taste of each other, and let me tell you I was addicted. She was all fire and heat, our bodies fitting to each other like a puzzle. My hand drifted to her hair, and I slid into the silk winding it around my hand. She gasped and I smelled a delicious spike in her scent. She pulled back, pushing me away and pulling me closer all at once. She gazed at me her eyes liquid and we panted. I think we were both floored at the level of right that had encompassed us.

"Was I-" she paused still breathing deeply, licking her lips, making my brain scramble to focus, because all I wanted to do was go back to kissing her. "Jake. Was I in love with you?" Nothing really could have ever prepared me for that question. I couldn't very well answer truthfully; nothing good would come out of it. It would just confuse her more and then I wouldn't be any better than the leeches trying to rob her of her new found freedom. I must have had a very uncomforting look on my face because Bella looked like she was about to crawl into the ground. I cleared my throat and pulled her closer, feeling the sensation of rightfulness when she was in my arms.

I buried my face in her shoulder and breathed her in. "I don't know Bella, we really never got that far…" She clutched me head, pulling me closer and embracing me fiercely. She shook her head a bit and spoke. "What-what do you mean, this feels so familiar, so right? How could it-" I laughed a bit when I felt like crying, god I was such a pussy. 'Test the waters, huh? This is more than putting my toe in to test the temperature dad.' "Bells, I really can't say much more. But just know that I have always and will always love you." She gave a choked gasp and pulled back to look at me in the eyes, I met them as levelly as I could. Her deep browns were filled with unshed tears and she cupped my face.

"Did I do something, Jake I'm so confused…" she begged. I couldn't stand it. If we didn't move away from this, I spill my heart and soul, make a mess of things. So I just shook my head, grabbed her hand, and moved towards the water. The sun was about 15 minutes from setting. Maybe we could watch it and regroup. "I can't hunny, that's something that just has to come back to you in time. And if not it has to be a decision you make." I said as I continued to pull us towards the water. She all but growled and wrenched her hand from mine. If the situation wasn't so serious I'd cuddle her for that growl, it had been so cute. But when I turned and saw her, that thought flew right out the window. "I wish you would all stop treating me like a child! I can handle whatever it is. Just please-"

And then she adopted that pose, the one I'd wish I could forget. The goddamned pose that she would fall into when that bastard had left her broken, and she had been desperately trying to hold herself together. Never again I told myself as I was moving towards her before I had even thought of it. "No, no, no Bells, you don't have to do that, I'm right here, I've got you." And then the damn broke, and she sobbed heart wrenching cries. I just held her, weathering the storm with her, petting her hair and whispering soft reassurances that I would always be there for her. When she had quieted, I leaned down and picked her light form up. She pulled tighter into my arms and I had to smile a bit at the nice feeling it gave me. Her letting me protect her.

I walked to the water and stood looking out at the falling sun, watching the swirling colors of red and oranges. She watched too, her eyes red from crying, but she was still the most beautiful thing I had ever laid eyes on. "You know what you remind me of Jake?" she said softly, moving to wrap her arms around me neck. I made a small noise of questions. She smiled a bit. "The sun." I'm sure she felt me tremble and I could help but feel the fear she was remembering again. 'Just keep fighting then Jake.' I kissed her forehead and spoke. "I know hunny. I know."

When the sky started to darken, we made our way back through the woods. I could feel my brothers watching our every move and I appreciated the protection. I put her in the car and we drove back in a comfortable silence. She had reached over at once point to hold my hand and I had relinquished it willingly. We got to her house way to quickly for my liking, and I whispered a quiet goodnight, sure she was tired after being out all day.

But then she asked me to come in for a bit. "Yeah, I'd love too." And then I was rushing to her side of the car to open the door and escort her to the door. She walked right in and I followed. "Bella? Is that that you-oh hey Jake did you guys have a good time today?" Charlie walked into the small hallway and then we all filtered back into the living room where he had come. "We had a great time Dad, we went to the beach and just hung out. Then watched the sunset, it was great to get out of the house." Bella said with excitement. I just smiled and then caught Charlie's look. The door bell rang and Bella left to answer it. "Sunset at the beach huh Jake?' Charlie grinned at me. If you could see the blush through my skin color I'd be in trouble. 'Especially if he knew you were making out with his daughter.'

Before I could make a comment on my lack of wooing technique, I smelled the sickening smell of Edward. "Be right back Charlie." I made my way back into the hallway by the door, just in time for Bella to run straight into me. "Jake!" she laughed and smacked me. I smiled and held up my hands in mock surrender. "Black." Edward's cool voice sounded and I lost all pretenses of smiles. "Nice to see you again Cullen." I muttered back in false politeness. 'What I'd give to have an airfreshner.' I thought and he sneered. "I could say the same. Have a nice day?"

"Great thanks." I flooded my brain with thoughts of flowers and oceans to cover up what the leech had no business of knowing and his brow furrowed in obvious anger. "Yeah the sunlight was great for Bella to be out in. I know how much you hate it though, so I took her out for some good old fashioned vitamin d." I showed him a picture of Bella bathing in the fading sunlight on the beach, the way she smiled and laughed. "I'm sure that's what you had in mind when you took her out for the entire day down at La Push of all places." I wanted to bite into him, and I couldn't help when Bella's misty just been kissed eyes filter into my brain. I heard his low hiss, and then we were saved by the bell.

Bella lightly laid her hand on my arm and all thoughts of ripping into the jackass in front of me vanished. "What do you need Bells?" I laid my hand lightly on the small of her back, and her scent changed immediately. I felt the need to be childish. 'That right leech, I did that.' "I just wanted to tell you thank you for getting me out for the day. I'm exhausted though, so would both of you mind-" she trailed off and I wanted to laugh out right, she was so cranky when she was tired. Then the bastards voice chimed in. "Yes, you should rest after exerting yourself so much today Bella, would you mind if I dropped by tomorrow?"

'Yes she minds.' But he ignored me and went on to Charlie, asking to take her out. Charlie made a good show of looking like he was thinking about it, to bad he didn't know that the leech could read his mind. Regardless, it was the Chiefs decision. Then Bella had to feel bad. I know that the reason, because she made her guilty face. "Well I don't want to go out for the entire day tomorrow, because I'm pretty tired right now, but maybe we can go catch some dinner or a movie?"

'NO YOU CAN'T HAVE DINNER!' I growled out in my mind and Edward knew it too because he smiled that creepy ass smile. "Dinner won't be necessary but a movie or something could be interesting." He continued to smile and looked towards me and it was all I could do not to throttle him. Bella excused herself and ran up stairs. Edward and I continued to stare at each other, and then he turned his nose up and said his goodbyes.

"Well Jake, guess your going to continue to have some competition." Charlie muttered and I snorted. "I will never see what she saw in that guy." He chuckled and patted me on the back as we walked to the door. "I'm rooting for you kid, just be careful with my daughter is all I ask."

I nodded and waved as I made my way to my car. "Talk to you later Chief!" And then I was driving home in the rabbit. My thoughts flickering through the days events and I couldn't help but feel a little gleeful and excited as I thought about the kiss and the obvious feelings Bella portrayed today.

I yawned tiredly as I pulled into the drive way of my house and walked in the house, throwing my keys down on the table. The house was dark, and I felt a bit guilty that I hadn't been here to help my dad. 'Well, he did tell me to hang out with Bella.' I was starving, but exhaustion was more apparent, so I made my way to my small bedroom and collapse on my bad. All I dreamt of that night was the sound of Bells.

A/N: Sorry this weeks been busy! Next chapter will probably be in Jakes POV too because I could put everything in this one and feel right about it. Plus I'm at 4,500+ words just in chapter content and its midnight and I have to be at work at 6am :-o But yeah, I'm rather disappointed as I've only gotten 11 reviews, I know you guys can do better! Especially since I get a story alert every hour or so. :P So review and the chapters will come faster. Hopefully I'll have the errors worked out in the chapters soon too as I might have a beta soon. Till next time. -Jinxie


	7. A love of the sun never dies

I don't own the Twilight.

Sup peoples. I loved all the reviews I've received over the last couple day and appreciate your thoughtfulness. You guys are awesome. Here's the next chapter as promised. Hope you enjoy!

Chapter 7

A love of the sun never dies.

Waking was never one of my favorite things. It meant I had to return to the real world, the world that used to be simple, but now had turned into something less than impossible. Being the responsible one had always been something I had been good at. When my mom had passed on, and my dad had lost the use of his legs, Rachel and Rebecca leaving-well it had left me with a great deal of responsibility and I took it on with no complaint.

But then, well, phasing was beyond responsibility. It was duty, and borderline servitude. I lost my carefree attitude, the almost man at the time, morphing into adulthood in an instant. Though that moment I wasn't really a man, I was beast. I was protector and guardian.

And even though I hated what I was, because of what it meant more that anything. I had decided early on to take it in stride. It wasn't something I could change, and if it meant I could protect the ones that I loved, then far be it from me to argue with the spirits that chose Jacob Black to do that.

I tried to open my eyes, but shut them again. I was still exhausted from many sleepless nights and too much work for anyone to handle, even a fast recovering werewolf. I let the sounds of the world around me bring me into awareness instead. The rolling of my dad's wheel chair in the kitchen, the light rain drizzling outside, and then a distant howl in the distance. 'Shut up Paul.' I grumbled in my head.

I heard a couple yips and an even louder howl and sighed. Paul had to be the most impatient person I knew. 'Well other than Rachel.' I finally forced myself in a seated position, the thin sheet bunching at my waist, my body naked. Quil had briefly joked we should become members in a nudist colony so we wouldn't have to carry around our clothes and would fit in. I had of course given him a good smack in the back of the head for even suggesting it.

The howl sounded again and I stood up, opening my window and jumping out easily. No need to blind my old man with my birthday suit. I phased, and the sounds of nature increased around me as well as the tunnel of thoughts that was the pack mind.

'Took you long enough. I'm starving and your just taking your sweet ass time.' Paul grumbled as I met him in the trees.

I swished my tail in irritation, still coming out of the fog of sleep. 'Yea yea, go eat then you complaining dog.' He snorted at my insult and nodded, moving further away from me.

'The fucking leech has been lurking around the treaty line since early early this morning. You might wanna see what that shits about, but that smells been making me nauseous all day.'

'Edward?'

'Yea that one.'

With that I lost the connection. I growled low in my throat and stalked towards the line, hackles rising as I caught a good whiff of his acrid smell. I stopped when I caught sight of him leaning again a tree, a rather annoyed look plastered on his face. "So you came." He said quietly, but I heard him like he was right next to me. 'Why are you here?' If I could have spat it, I would have. The bastard gave me such a bad taste in my mouth. "I think we know why we are both here Black, though I'm more here to establish some boundaries you seem to keep crossing." He had yet to look at me, he had been toying with cedar trees leaves, but when he said that he met my wolfs eyes evenly. "Stay away from Bella, she made her choice, and I fear your taking her memories loss much too aggressively."

I snarled, jumping to the very edge of the line that had held for hundreds of years. 'She makes her own choices you scum! I would never do anything to harm her, unlike you asshole! You're the one who wont fucking leave when she has every opportunity to live normally now. How dare you try to take away her second chance!' He had also stepped away from the tree, face twisted in rage and the long whites of his teeth bared.

"I will never leave Bella again, she is my soul mate and I am hers. You're deluding yourself in believing you have a chance, and even if you did, it's only for right now. Once she remembers, she will come back to me." He yelled. I don't believe I had ever seen him lose his composure since I had had the misfortune of meeting him. I pulled back slightly, still growling, but his words rung true in my head.

He smiled, and laughed, the sound grating on me like nails on a chalk board. "That's right Jacob, your only setting yourself up for more rejection. I'm doing you a favor."

The wound in my heart ripped, and I could almost feel myself bleeding. Remembering how Bella had left me on the bed, wounded and dejected, broken and bleeding. She had chosen, and it hadn't been me…

I wanted to run again, to escape into the mind of the wolf and be the ruthless untamed animal again. 'Was I-Jake was I in love with you?' her voice brought me out of the darkness I had been falling into, and I briefly heard the gasp of horror come from my unchosen companion. 'I feel like there are these strings holding you and me together.'

I raised my eyes from where they had fallen to the ground during my brief fall into desolation and looked at Edward fiercely. 'She may have chosen you first, she may even choose you again, but for every moment that I have the opportunity to have her, I'm going to take it. Because like it or not, there's a part of her that remembers me and whatever may or may not have been there.' Her smiling and whispering my name in her sleep flashed through my mind, and a part of me felt guilty that I was sharing our private moments with him. I had no control when I was emotional like this though, not like Leah did.

"We'll see Black, but she is mine. You'll find that out soon enough." He said stiffly and disappeared quickly in a flash of white. I snorted and shook out my coat, trying to rid myself of some of the aggression in my body. 'You can come out now Sam.'

'I'm impressed with how well you handled that Jacob. I thought I was going to have to step in there for a moment.'

'I can handle the leech.'

'I see that now.'

We both paused and were silent. 'I'll take over patrol for today. You've been tired lately and that leaves you open for attack. Why don't you go home and get some rest.'

Though I thought to argue, because after that I could really use the run to calm down, I could feel the fatigue creeping through my body and I nodded heading in the direction of my house. He nodded back to me and went to stand vigil. 'I'm proud of you Jacob, you'll make a great Alpha some day.' I gave what would have been a laugh, but sounded more like a coughing growl. 'Not likely Sam, I'll leave that up to you.' I phased quickly to cut off any other thoughts that may have passed back at me and continued walking to my house.

I grabbed some pants hanging on a low hanging tree branch on the outskirts of the property and pulled them on. 'Alpha, someday huh? Not by my choice.' I walked up the porch just as the phone rang. Grabbing it quickly as a habit, saying a quick greeting. I was met by silence and then a light gasp. Concern quickly over taking me I looked at the caller id and noticed it was the Swan residence. "Hello?" I asked again, and a whimper passed through the speaker.

After today's already strange events, this was spooking the hell out of me and I was moments away from hightailing it over to her. "Bella? Is that you hunny, are you okay?" She coughed and cleared her throat. "Sorry, I just remembered something and I was in a little shock. I'm here." I couldn't really hold in the sigh of relief as I chuckled nervously. "Don't scare me like that; you remembered something, that's great hunny, what was it." I couldn't exactly chase away the feeling that my stomach was going to drop out either. She laughed and said my phone number.

"I'm flattered! So what's up, you just get up, you still sound sleepy." Relaxing a bit, now that I didn't feel like the floor was going to drop out from underneath me. That and Bella's sleep muddle voice was entirely adorable. 'God I'm a sap.' She chatted excitably about a dream she had the night before, and my relaxed posture disappeared. "Really, was it a nightmare…you used to have some really bad ones?" She made a comment about Charlie, and I knew she had to have wakened him up with her screams like she used too. "You, Edward, and this strange guy were there and he sparkled and you turned into a wolf." She laughed over the line. I caught the last part and froze.

"A wolf huh? What did I look like?" I couldn't help but ask and felt a sense of fear when she described me dead on. The rest of the conversation was mostly lost when I heard a threatening growl from the front of the house, and I knew I was needed. I made some quick excuse and was about to get off the phone when she caught me. "I think I love you too." And then the phone went dead.

I stared at the phone, and I think if someone had a camera, the look I had on my face would have been priceless. '-the fuck?' I wasn't able to really think further than that as a loud howl sounded and I quickly ran for the front of the house, Quil, Embry, Seth, and Leah in wolf form stood in formation around my porch. I shifted, ripping through my pant without a thought and they turned and were running in the other direction in a moment, me falling into pace easily. Images of a vampire within the treaty line, looking for something, inhaling a fragrance in the air and I felt my heart stop with the realization that all I could smell through the links memories was the fragrant scent of forest, myself, and then-Bella.

'He's been tracking her, we've traced him throughout the forest and he's been following her scent around for a while.' Seth voice came through.

'This is chick is a magnet for danger!'

'Shutup dude!'

All there voices kind of blurred together and I tried to focus of not freaking out like I wanted too. Why after all she had been through and when she could finally move on from the shit that came with the supernatural.

'We need to set up a vigil on her from now on; we must protect her from whatever this may mean. This is not one of the Cullen's as he was on our lands, however we need to contact them and see what they may know.' Sam's voice joined us as he joined the pack.

I looked up. 'I'll do it.'

You could all but hear the eye roll in Leah's thoughts. 'Oh I'm sure you will.'

Sam ignored us both. 'We all will, take shifts, just like we do with patrols. Once we find out more information about him, we'll decide if it needs to be in groups or if one of us is enough.' He moved to the front of the pack, racing towards the Cullen's home. 'Come, let's get this over with.'

It was little over a twenty minute run, and as per the treaty we shifted to our human forms, Quil handing me an extra pair of pants he always seemed to have. When we walked out of the woods they were already waiting for us. The doc at the front, Alice on his right, and Edward on the left. Sam nodded to them, looking around for the others. "Hunting." Edward said nonchalantly, and we all crinkled our noses at the thought.

"We've come to discuss a stranger that has made his presence know in our lands." Carlisle looked concerned. "A stranger?" and then Edward made a straggled noise, in the back of his throat. "He can't have possibly come all this way." Alice gasped and made a grab for Carlisle's, who immediately wrapped an arm around her. "What do you see Alice?" Edwards's voice was thick with fear, and I'm sure if the smell of death wasn't so strong around them I would be able to smell it. The pack watched them with varying looks of confusion and interest.

"Its Aro, he's come for Bella, he knows she's not human!" She paced, and my brothers shifted, wary. "He found her scent in the forest, he's looking for her! He wants-god! He wants to change her, but is more interested in tasting her. Edward, you must get to her before he does, I told you should have let the change happen!"

Sam cleared his throat when it looked like I would say something about that last comment and I held my tongue. "Is this Aro more dangerous then others we have faced in the past?" he questioned Carlisle directly and the blonds eyes took on a sad look. "He is like the acting president for the vampire world I'm afraid. You couldn't take on a more dangerous opponent. And where he goes, so do his body guards, who are equally if not more dangerous." He paused and looked directly at me then, and I shifted uncomfortably. "I know you wont like to hear this, but at this point it is almost more kind to Bella to turn her." I growl in reflex. "Of course you would say that, it's what your so called son wants, any thing to mak-"

"Jacob."

I shut my mouth when I felt the alpha command go through me, but I wanted to fight it. I wanted to protect Bella, and nothing would stop me. It made me think of her dreams, how even in her unconscious mind, when she had forgotten everything, the darkness still haunted her. "Dreams?" Edward questioned. "She dreamt of us then?" I hated ever ounce of hope that I heard in his voice. 'Of us, and some one else. Stay out of my head.'

His face fell a bit, when he realized I was talking about him and myself, and not just the vampires. 'I hold a place in heart too, remember that.' I growled and he sneered. Sam watched out silent communication with interest, but chose not to comment. "Our pact will be setting up a watch for her then, thank you for sharing your information with us, but we will leave now." Sam said turning, the others following in his wake. I stood a moment longer, my gaze lingering on Edward.

I knew he was going out with Bella today, and damned if it didn't rub me the wrong way but I had to voice my thoughts. 'Protect her or I will kill you, treaty or not.'

"I would never allow anyone to harm her, not before I'm destroyed myself." He vowed, and it was the only sense of comradely we had towards to each other. The only thing we would ever have in common, a need to keep Bella safe. Only in my mind, that included her being alive, preferably kissing me like she had at the beach.

He hissed. "Despicable dog." He spat, and I turned following my brothers who waited for me at the tree line. 'Just so you know that she will always love the sun-'

A/N: Whoo! I'm wiped, sleepy sleepy! I wanted to finish Jacobs POV to give an idea of everything that was going on. Sorry if it bordered on redundant or boring at times. Next chapter should be a little bit more hopping. As always read and review! I love all the favorite story alerts I'm getting too. Love ya'll!

Jinxie


	8. As easy as breathing

Chapter 8

Easy as breathing

A/N: Sorry for the long wait, I made this chapter a little longer to make up for it. I went on vacation to the Bahamas for my birthday I don't own twilight.

I had subsequently locked myself in my bed room after meeting Edward that afternoon. My head was killing me and confusion had set in to a degree I never thought possible. I wanted to scream or cry, to be angry or laugh. This quite literally reminded me of a nervous breakdown I had read about. When Edward had kissed me, I had felt the familiarity of it, and I knew the act had been practiced before.

That didn't stop it from feeling wrong. His lips were hard and cold, like ice and though my heart had sped up when his lips had touched mine, I didn't know if it was out of excitement or fear. I felt like I was being choked by the overwhelming feelings it had given me. It wasn't right.

When Jake and I had kissed, I had felt consumed, sure. But it felt like it was okay to let go of any inhibitions I had been clinging to, because he was there to protect me, he was the gravity that held me to the ground. With Edward, I felt like I would fly skyward and never come down, and as a result would drift further into space with nothing to console me in the many years of drifting to come.

Then there were these flashes and dreams. I was starting to believe they were true, and that sent me into a whole new barrage of emotions. 'I could be committed for Christ sake!' I paced my room, and wondered if I would wear a whole into the floor, because I had been at it for hours now. The door slammed closed downstairs and I jumped, spinning around to stare at the door of my bedroom.

"Bella? Are you home?" Charlie voice carried up the stairs and I glared at my feet. I was frustrated, tired, and fed up. I quickly walked to my door, opened it and made my way downstairs. I was on a mission, and I would not fail. I stepped into the living room, where my dad had already made himself comfortable on his lazy boy, beer in hand. "Hi Dad, how was today?" I leaned against the couch, too worked up to sit.

He looked at me and sighed. "Long day, a lots going on, in fact I'll probably pull another 14 hour day tomorrow. How you feeling?" I bit my lip and his eyebrows furrowed in concern as he turned more of his focus on me. "Bells?" I was feeling a bit guilty after his speech, so I decided I would pester him another day. 'Mission is an epic fail.'

"What going on at the station?" I asked instead of answering his voiced concerns. Still watching me with unease he replied. "Three people have been found murdered out in the woods in the last 48 hours." He sighed. "Actually it looks like they have been mauled, but I'm not convinced that we have a human eating bear out there. So I'm trying to open a homicide case. The higher ups are giving us issues though." Charlie leaned back in the chair and took a swig of his beer. "I don't want you out in the woods from now on Bella, I know you like to go hiking or you did before umm- just stay close to the house and town." He cleared his throat and nodded to himself.

"Is animal mauling in this area normal?" I asked as I finally sat down on the couch to face him, worried about the lines bracketing his eyes. 'He needs to sleep.' He shook his head. "Semi-common on the trails, but this is close to town, so no." He watched me. "You going to tell me what's bothering you now?"

My eyes widened and I sent him a questioning glace. He actually smiled and chuckled a bit. "You're a terrible liar Bella, and you've always worn your feelings on your sleeve. I won't push you, but I here if you need to umm talk or something." He looked a bit uncomfortable and I came to the startling realization that we probably had never had any conversations like this. 'Was I really that selfish?' Tears were in my eyes before I knew it and Charlie had made his way to my side silently, gently rubbing my back.

I looked at him, and I think he knew I felt lost. "Honey everything will work itself out. I know it's got to be hard, but Ill do what ever I can to make it easier." I leaned up against his shoulder and shook my head, my hair falling to hide my eyes. "Dad- please I need you to tell me something's about my past, I need to know, because I don't know what to think-" I took a shuddering breath as more tears ran down my cheeks. I felt so misplaced.

He rubbed my arm and pulled me closer and he leaned us back to rest on the couch. "How about this I'll try my best to answer your questions and we go a little bit at a time day by day. Let's say five questions a day." I sighed and pulled my knees up on to the couch so I could lean further against him, he tensed as if not used to the contact but relaxed. "Okay, I can work with that."

"It'll get easier too, your going back to school next week, you wont just be cooped up her with your old man." He laughed a bit and I joined in quietly as I felt my eyes drooping from the eventfulness of the day. "We have all the time in the world Bella, go ahead and go to sleep." He whispered and blackness claimed me before I could respond.

_I was standing on a cliff overlooking the beach, the wind was blowing and the long strands of my hair whipping around me. I heard a distant howl on the wind, and the smell of the rain was thick in the air. _

"_Edward." I heard myself whisper as I stepped to the edge of the cliff, I noticed the rocking waters at the bottom and for some reason felt accomplished. Taking a deep quivering breath, I jumped and the feeling of the air splitting around me was invigorating, but then I hit the water and anything good I had been feeling was washed away with the iciness of the water and then unfathomable undertow that pulled me beneath the depths. I floated under the water, not struggling to break for air. Then I saw red in the distortion of the water, gleaming eyes gazing at me, a full mouth grinning with sharp teeth. _

_I swam backwards trying to escape, and felt the stab of rocks hitting my head before the world around me painfully pulsed and then I was sinking. I felt the last of my air escape my lips as I drifted downwards. Then out of the corner of my eye, was Edward. Floating downwards with me, I reached for him weakly, and just as I was about to grasp him a scorching hand grabbed me under my shoulder. My hand passed through Edwards and then he disappeared._

_Hot lips pressed against mine, breathing in something I seemed to be missing and I gasped and coughed. Warm hands brushed over my brow and deep brown eyes looked into mine, wild with fear. There was this feeling pulling me toward him, anchoring and sealing me to him and this feeling that had been with me since I could remember being filled. _

_I welcomed it and wanted it. But then the pale visage of amber and brown flashed in my mind and I could not let go. The heat that had been washing over me, healing the broken edges of disrepair, was torn and I felt the jagged emptiness overtake me again. _

I launched upright, desperately trying to catch my breath, clutching my heart which was thumping hard in chest. I looked wildly around the room and realized I was still in the living room. Pale light was flickering though the curtains and as I finally calmed my self enough to glanced at the clock on the wall.

10:34 am.

I flopped down on the couch and pulled the covers over my eyes. 'What was that? Was it dream or reality?' My head ached again and I rolled off the couch, looking around feeling the emptiness of the house closing in around me. 'Charlie must have gone to work already.' It was confirmed when I saw another note posted on the fridge.

'Remember what I told you about the woods. Be out late tonight, don't worrying about waiting up. Love Dad'

I sighed and walked upstairs, climbing into the shower after disrobing. Tears pored from my eyes, hidden in the water streaming from above, but it couldn't hide my sobs. 'I don't understand any of this!' Every things was coming quicker now. I ground my teeth and squeezed my eyes shut and before I knew it I had punched the wall of the shower. Pain burst through me and I forgot my temper tantrum and pulled my fist to my chest.

"Dammit!" I hissed and quickly turned the shower off, throwing a robe over my naked form. I tripped all the way down the stairs still cursing under my breathing. I sat on a chair in the kitchen and bravely opened uninjured hand to inspect the throbbing hand. Before I could get a real look at it however, a knock sounded at the front door.

"Who is it!" I ground out, and squeezed my eyes shut as my hand began to throb. "Bella? It's just Jake." I felt a bit of excitement, but it was quickly drowned out by the pain. "Umm-err is the door open?" I yelled back and he replied no. "Are you okay Bella?" his voice was starting to sound concerned and I forced myself to stand and make my way to the door. I opened the door slightly and peeked out at him. "This is really embarrassing Jacob, so if you laugh at me I swear I'll kick you right back out." I growled and opened the door for him to come in. He stood in the door way, eyes wide staring at me, mouth agape. It was then I realized I was just wearing the thin cotton of my robe, hair a soaking mess around me and I internally groaned. 'Way to make an impression.'

"Bells?" he squeaked and it made me feel the slightest bit better. I walked back to the kitchen and leaned over my hand; he followed me and arched a brow, embarrassment forgotten. "Are you okay honey?" He made his way over to me and leaned down on his knees so he was my height. He tucked a piece of hair behind my ear and I angry huffed. "I punched the wall okay-I think I broke my hand." I grouched. He gently guided my hands down to my lap from my chest and teased my hand away from the injured one. "You punched the wall Bella." I could hear some amusement as well as concern and I growled. "Remember what I said Jacob. You will go out." He was holding in a chuckle and then he hissed when he saw my hand.

"Surely you knew the wall would win Bella, Jesus, I might have to take you to the hospital." I felt his hand gently touching the knuckles and I gritted my teeth. I looked down at the hand and felt the world swim, bloody knuckles and black and blues stared back at me. I felt my breathing pick up and my head spinning. I was picked up gently and set down on the kitchen counter. "Bella-Hey snap out it. Breath in and out-in and out." I followed the instruction and finally opened my eyes when I felt like I wouldn't pass out.

"You okay now?" I heard Jake ask and I looked up at him and notice our position. I was sitting on the counter top in my kitchen, Jacob-a shirtless Jacob resting between my legs, his hands holding the missing shirt around my hand gently. I stared dazed, what was going on again. "Bella?" his voice sounded like it was in a tunnel. I leaned forward and touched his face with one hand, moving it to the back of his head and into his hair. I started to pull him downwards, leaning my face towards him in a silent appeal and he followed my lead with no resistance, saying my name again, only now it was whispered. I felt the world explode in colors when his lips touched mine and he shifted closer, one hand cupping the back of my head. I could feel the heat coming off of him in waves and let my hand drop down to touch his chest. He made a noise resembling a growl and his hand traveled down to my lower back to pushing me closer. His tongued slid into my mouth and I returned the pressure just as greedily, biting lightly on his lower lip. He groaned and just as I was about push myself closer with my other hand, a searing white hot flash of pain distracted me. "Shit!" I gasped.

He immediately grasped me lightly and made a frustrated noise that I knew was him being annoyed with himself. "I'm so sorry Bella, I should have known better. Come on, we need to get you to the hospital and get you looked at." He leaned down to pick me up and I tried to catch my breath. "I need to put some clothes on Jacob." I mentioned when he began towards the door. His grinned sheepishly and nodded, turning towards the stairs and taking two of them at a time with his large gait.

"Umm-You need any help?" he gulped and I giggled at the look on his face. "I think I've got it covered. I'll be down in a moment." He nodded and I shut the door. 'What was that, poor guy I practically jumped him.' My cheeks heated with the thought of his body against mine. I had never felt something so tangible, or at least I didn't think I had. I threw on some underwear and had a hard time with my pants. Then I stared at my bra I had pulled out with trepidation. 'How is this going to work.' I tried and tried but could not for the life of me get it on. 'You could just ask Jake.' A snarky voice said. 'Um no.' I replied back and contemplated a button up flannel. Shrugging I donned the black shirt sans bra and buttoned it the best I could.

I walked down the stair and Jacob waited by the door, looking way to beautiful for it to be legal. 'You are a perv Isabella Swan.' He looked at me and smiled and then laughed. "Hold on honey let me fix this real quick." He said as I reached his side. He quickly unbuttoned the top buttons of my shit before I could protest, but then stalled when his knuckles brushes the naked flesh of the valley between my breasts where a bras fabric would have normal have been. I gulped when he froze. "I couldn't get it on." I mumbled and flushed. His breath stalled and he cleared his throat. "Umm, yeah that makes sense." He righted the button with shaky hands and pulled me towards the door and out towards the car.

Out ride to the hospital was tense and I was internally worried that our friendship had been compromised. We sat in silence the whole ride there and the only thing he had said when we got to the hospital was some thing about it being a few minutes but I would be back soon.

They called my name and I headed back, looking back at Jake when I realized he wasn't coming. He nodded to me and I frowned. I sat in the cold and sterile hospital room waiting, feeling my insecurities and fears coming back the longer I was away from Jake and alone. 'Does he make me feel better? Like my dream?'

A nurse came in before I could think on that further and lead me to get an x-ray. Twenty minutes later, I was informed that it was just some nasty bruising and to be more careful. Hand wrapped in a brace and chastised I made my way to the waiting room where Jake was. The closer I got the better I felt, tension leaving my muscles.

The doors slid open and I spotted him just as he spotted me. He stood and walked towards me and we met in the middle, eyes on each others. "You okay?" he said as he brushed away some hair from my eyes and I nodded. "Just some bruising, cant even break my hand properly it seems." He chuckled and grabbed my good hand leading us back out side. It was raining and we jogged towards the car, laughing.

The tension that had been a suffocating cloud on our way there was gone, replace with a comfortable one with music playing in the back round. We were almost to my house when Jake tensed and slowed, his eyes taking on a glow I had never seen before. "How about we go to my house for a bit Bells?" he asked, voice controlled and low. I nodded, never taking my eyes off of him as he sped up again, the rabbit protesting the speed. We reached his house quickly and I stepped out of the car, rain slicking my hair at the now downpour. Jake reached my side grasping my good hand, urging me towards the house it seemed franticly. "Jake-What are you doing?" I could feel his hand shaking and it made me think of my dream. I gasped and pulled back, my hand slipping easily from his grasped due to the rain.

He spun and looked about ready to throw me over his shoulder when his eyes rounded and focused on something behind me. A truly terrifying snarl issued from his throat, eyes turning darker, form beginning to blur. "Bella go inside now." He whispered his eyes never leaving what was behind me.

It may have to do with the fact I'm doomed to be one of those girls that get murdered in a horror flick or it could be that I'm unnaturally curious and don't know when to listen, but which ever it is, I turned to look over my shoulder and my blood ran cold at what I saw.

There standing at the tree line, a figure stood draped in a sharp suit that clung to him with the weight of the rain. His skin white and hair dark and long, but what stood out the most, was the maniacal grin that held sharp canines, and those eyes. Those blood red eyes that had haunted me since the first time I had dreamt of them. He focused on my face and laughed, the sound making me shiver. "Isabella, how good it is to see you again." He licked his lips and the next thing I knew I was behind Jacobs quivering body. "Leave this place!" he snarled and I took a step back away from him. The man in the trees ignored him and smiled beseechingly at me. "How very exciting this is, Isabella, I can hardly wait to taste you; your blood is practically singing with fear. Most delicious." He took a step forward. Then all hell broke loose and I was startled to say the least. Jake snarled and his form blurred into the russet wolf of my dreams, baring teeth at the creature in the forest. The man paused and looked thoughtful. "Oh how very quaint, you've taken in a stray." He chuckled to himself and I looked at him from behind my place behind the wolf I was sure was Jake. "Who are you? How do I know you? What are you taking about?" I screamed and backed away, Jake following my movements and continuing to place himself between myself and the man.

He laughed though it sounded slightly angered. "You dare forget me little singer. That is not very polite as I have not forgotten you. In fact I've traveled some way to see you." My eyes widened as his form was suddenly closer, and the rumble that came from the wolf in front of me distracted me. I trembled and remember not being afraid of the wolf in my dream, that he would protect me. I took slow steps towards the wolf, shaking but sure of my decision. I moved to the wolf's side, grasping the russet fur, like a child would a treasure blanket. I could almost feel the surprise of the animal, but he let out a soft purr of comfort and I knew I had been right. "I don't know who you are or what you are, but you need to leave." I said shakily, not knowing where this courage was coming from.

The wolf growled and then raised his head in a howl that shook me with the familiarity of it. Seconds later, multiple howls sounded back. The man looked displeased and looked at me with malice. "I am Aro, best you remember it this time Isabella." And then he was gone like he had never been there. I could hear the pounding of feet in the distance and adrenaline pumped through me, I wanted to run, but I was frozen to the spot and my hands were going numb with how hard I was grasping the thick fur on the wolf next to me.

A group of six wolfs exploded into the clearing and I gasped at the sheer size of them. They stared towards us and my body quivered. A large black wolf, made his way closer and I gasped hiding my face in the fur bracketing my body. I felt the snarl, and then the wolf I was holding on to lowered in to a laying position and I followed leaning into the curve of its body. When silence had reigned for some time I lifted my head and notice we were alone. The wolf's face lowered in a silent show of submission and I stared into the deep brown of the eyes I knew so well. Shaky hands moved towards the muzzle and I touched softly, feeling some fear, but more amazement. I rubbed the soft fur, and listened to the soft rumble that began.

"This is crazy." I whispered, and the wolf made a barking noise that I thought could have been a laugh. I narrowed my eyes. "It's not funny; I could be locked up for this." Again the wolf barked, though this time his tongue rolled out much to my exasperation. I continued to run my hands through his fur, realizing it was calming me as much as it was calming him. "So it's all real." I quietly murmured. Looking up when the he nosed me, I saw the question in his eyes. "My dreams, you're a wolf and you protect me." I paused and crinkled my nose. "Though I'm still not sure from what." I felt him tense and it was my turn to look at him questionably. He huffed and settled down, head laid on his paws. 'If that's not an I don't want to talk about, I don't know what is.'

I stood and walked out in front of him, seating myself so I could really look at him. He raised his head, cocking it to the side in a very puppy like manner and I giggled. He grumbled, and then the next thing I knew he licked my face. "Ewww!" I sputtered and wiped my face with the sleeves of my shirt. I glared at him and stood crossing my arms, back facing him. I heard him stand and felt the heavy head lay gently on my shoulder. I nuzzled my head against his muzzle and turned, now serious. "So your really Jake? I'm not dreaming." He nodded and sat down. I gazed at him. "Prove it." I whispered and raised an eyebrow when he all but grinned, his form blurring, and there stood Jake.

Eyes comically wide I stared at him. All of him. Then I realized why he had grinned that way and spun around. "You could have warned me Jake!" I screamed and was not comforted at all when he burst out laughing. "Well you said prove it!" "I didn't know that meant you were going to be naked!" "How was I supposed to know?" "Arg! Go put some clothes on!"

He was still laughing as I felt him approach and place a hand on my shoulder. Despite the gravity of the situation that had just past, I still knew he was naked, I felt my blood heat. "You need to come inside too Bella, I'll be right behind you." I nodded and forced myself to breath and not think about Jacob naked. It was a much more pleasant thought than thinking about the terrifying red eyes however, so I used it to distract myself. The house was quiet and I stepped into the living room, trying not to look behind me as I heard Jake make his way to his bedroom.

'You acting like a hormone driven teenager.' I thought to myself. 'Well duh.' I shook my head and wandered through the living room, much to keyed up to sit. I was staring at some pictures on the mantle and smiled when I saw Jacob and a little girl that resembled me playing in the mud. 'Mud pies.' I was just starting to turn when warm arms slid around me from behind and a chin rested on my shoulders. I relaxed. "Are you okay Bella, like really okay-your way to calm for someone who just saw what they did." The deep tone of his voice made me shiver, and I leaned back into him. "I would hardly say that I'm calm Jake-I just some how know that you will never hurt me. That I'm safe or something with you." I turned in the circle of his arms and wrapped my own around his neck, looking into his eyes which were filled with some many emotions.

"Your right, I would never hurt you, or let someone else hurt you." He voice holding a certainty that I would believe regardless of any situation. 'I trust him.' I tilted my head and ran a finger down his face, rough with five o' clock shadow. "Did I know about you before I forgot every thing?" he tensed and I felt the invisible barrier he had just erected as he stepped away from me. Loss pulled at me and the feeling tore through me, only stronger this time.

"You knew, we protected you just like we did tonight." He murmured, face a mask of control and I envied him. I couldn't stand it, so I followed him to where he had sat in the open window ledge. The day was cloudy, darker with storm, and we listened to the rain for a bit before I spoke again. "What was he Jake?" I whispered. I lowered my head and a headache coming on. "Why did he seem to know me?"

Jake sighed and shook his head. "I can't tell you Bella. Remember what the doctor said about jarring your memories. I won't hurt you." He looked angry, though he had never even looked at me, just continued to stare at the rain. "It's more than that isn't it?" I questioned, turning his head with my hand on his cheek. He still averted his eyes and let out a frustrated sound. He finally looked at me his face drawn into a scowl, and I almost gasped out loud at the fear I saw lingering in his eyes, fear he was desperately trying to hide. "Jacob-why?" he just shook his head and withdrew my hand gently and stood moving toward the couch to sit down. I watched him, feeling the tug again, though this time it was different, less pronounced. "You're afraid. Why are you afraid?"

"Bella stop. I told you I can't." He laid his head in his hands, grasping at the hair on his head. 'I can't stand to see him like this.' He was so strong and happy all the time, that seeing him so desolate and upset felt like I was being ripped apart. 'Enough.' I thought as I strode towards, purpose in mind. He raised his head to look at me, leaning back against the couch, leaving himself open. "Bella-I told you-" I silenced him with the press of my lips as I sat on his lap.

Hoping I wasn't completely misreading him, and that he wanted this as much as I seemed to want to, I was gentle and slow. He didn't respond for a moment and I was about to pull back when his hands gripped me, one hand sliding into the locks of my hair, the other wrapping around my waist to bring me closer. His mouth slid open and then we were battling for dominance in the kiss. I shifted forward, trying to destroy the distance between us and he groaned, tilting my head to the side and nibbling on my neck. I gasped and shifted closer again. The hand at my waist tightened and tilted my hips, bring me in contact with the manifestation of his excitement, I moaned when it brushed against the bundle of nerves between my thighs and he answered with a gasped version of my name.

Our lips met again, my good hand wrapped in the silk of his hair and the other wrapped around shoulder as I tilted my hips into his. His hand left my hair, traveling to my thigh hitching it higher around it waist, the other travel under my shirt to brace me, his hand cupping my neck. A practically strong thrust against my center had me crying out his name breaking away from his lips, he nuzzled my neck and into the open buttons of my blouse. When that had happened I would never know, but the others were quickly unbuttoned and his lips circling one of my naked breasts. "Oh god!" I gasped as a new feeling over took me. "Bells." He groaned biting one of the sensitive peeks. "Jake!"

I was on fire. Everywhere he touched was set aflame and what had started out as a means to comfort to calm him was quickly turning into an inferno of passion and feelings I had only had a taste of. I wanted more, we had to have done this before, he knew exactly what to do to cascade me into oblivion.

The movement of our hips was becoming frantic, and I knew he was close as I was. "Bella-I-come for me Bella." He groaned huskily, biting my neck. I gasped feeling tingles rushing through me, a numbing heat beginning. "Say my name Bella." He growled and I shuddered at the sound of his voice, and then something snapped and I was gasping out his name. A few moments later, he was choking out mine, his body straining, eyes shut in ecstasy.

He fell back against the couch and I fell with him, resting on his naked chest, revealing in the feeling of skin touching skin as my shirt lay in to crooks of my arms. We both panted, tracing shapes on each others skin. "Where did that come from?" he breathed, tightening his arms around me, nuzzling my hair. I smiled against the skin of his neck. "I needed to touch you; it's been bugging me all day." I joked though I was serious.

He lifted my chin and sweetly kissed me. "We shouldn't have done that Bella." He whispered and I tensed and looked at him in shock. His eyes quickly widened as he realized what he just said. I sat up and he grabbed my hips still straddling his waist. "I didn't mean it like that! I just meant that you're still unsure of everything and I don't want you to regret it!" I huffed still not pleased with his explanation.

I struggled to get up but he held strong. I glared at him. "Let go Jacob." He looked frantic and it might have been funny if I wasn't so upset. I mean really, it's the only sexual encounter that I have to go off of and he tells me we shouldn't have done it. "Bella, please understand, there's a lot of stuff you don't know." He begged. I crossed my arms. "Um yeah I know that. But it wouldn't be that way if someone would tell me what the hell is going on!" I struggled again and he let me up finally and I was already making my way to the door when he caught me, spinning around to give him a piece of my mind, he caught my lips before so much as a peep could come out.

When he pulled back I was dazed, he looked into my eyes like he was trying to decrepit my soul and smiled when he saw something he had to have been looking for. "I don't regret it Bella, I never will. I just don't want you to hate me when and if you remember. I don't want you to regret it."

I cuddled into him, nodding and gently kissing the exposed skin of his chest. "Jacob, I really don't think I could ever regret being with you. Definitely not hate you." I tilted my head back and looked into his eyes, half smiling. "Because being with you, it's really as easy as breathing don't you think?"


	9. I see into your future

A Light at the End of Darkness

Chapter 9

AN: Sorry for the long wait, I've been busy! Getting back into school is a pain in the ass, let me tell you. But without further ado I give you the next chapter! Sorry for any errors, I try and catch them, but sometimes they go over my notice!

I see into your future.

I'm still surprised every time I look down and see the small body curled up against mine. To tell you the truth, I'm wondering when I'll wake up and realize it's a dream and I'll feel that same horrible pain when I look across the room and see her smiling on that leeches arm. But here she is, cuddled up against me, soft breath raising the hair on my skin as it ghosts over me like a lovers touch. She's sleeping, face lax in slumber, her small hand resting on my bare chest. I'm an idiot I realize with a tight smile, as I brush the hair out of her face.

Only hours ago she had been let back in the circle of half-truths and lies; Hours ago she had faced her enemy out on my front lawn; Hours ago, I had burst into fur and teeth to protect her; Hours ago we had come close to becoming one and the same…

I took a deep breath at the thought and calmed myself. God, being with her was damn near perfect, our bodies meshing together like a puzzle. And the passion, all mind and body consuming; I could and would never believe that there was someone out there that would call to my soul like hers did to mine. With Bella, there was no rhyme or reason; it was only her and I, descending in a haze of feeling and awareness unlike anything I had ever experienced.

When running as the wolf and filtering through the pack mind, I saw the imprints together, I felt what they felt, and sometimes it was hard to see the difference between what I felt for Bella. Sam had once told me that the distinction was so meniscal, and that thought kept me believing that I would never imprint on another. Bella shifted next to me, murmuring sleepily, face nuzzling in the crook of my neck.

I smiled, kissing her forehead gently. No there could be no other, she was it for me, just like my dad had said. "No, I want to brush you, your hairs all tangle!" Bella mumbled and for a moment I thought she was awake. When she only scrunched her face up in annoyance, I grinned. 'What could she be dreaming?' I pictured my wolf sitting patiently on the front steps of a cottage, wagging his tail beseechingly with his hair matted with sticker burs as Bella shook a thick brush at him. The visual proved to be my undoing, because I snorted with laughter.

I calmed after struggling with myself for a moment, though the grin could not be contained as I stared down at the girl who I'd do anything for. She knew and she wasn't afraid. She had approached my wolf, and asked for his protection, and he just like me would do anything for her. 'Can't believe the packs stayed away for this long.' The thought disturbed me, she knew about us again, although she had yet the put faces with fur. 'She'll know about the others soon too then.' A nagging voice said in the back of my head and I frowned heavily. 'Edward.' The wolf inside me snarled and I tugged Bella closer, as if that alone could protect her. I felt so guilty when it came to what had happened between us. She said she could never hate me, but I feared it, especially knowing that it was wrong, no matter how right it had felt.

'If she did remember, would she use it as a means to end us or would it open her eyes to see just how amazing this could be.' I mulled, and sighed when I could give myself no answer. Only Bella would be able to answer that, if she ever did remember. 'But what if she doesn't? Does that mean I'll always feel like I'm betraying her?' Have I mentioned how much I hate my brain.

"Jacob." A quiet voice said from the hallway of the living room. I looked up, instantly wary from my place on the couch. "Sam, what's up?" I nodded, keeping my voice quiet, not wanting to disturb Bella. He threw his head to the side gesturing for me to follow him, and I frowned not wanting to leave, but gently detangled Bella's limbs from around me, laying her down on the couches pillows. Padding on silent feet to the front door and then the porch. Silence prevailed and I took notice that the rains had stopped and it was reaching dusk.

"I had to go to them Jacob." Was all he said and instantly the burning anger was there. I stayed silent as I didn't trust myself to speak. He glanced at me from the corner of his eye, and I just glared out into the forest. "They mentioned that he's the head of the Voltori and it's as Alice saw, he's come for her." I couldn't contain to growl that ruptured from my throat. "What else." I gritted my teeth. He nodded. "You're not going to like this part at all, Jacob." He paused and leaned against the rail of the porch, looking me in the eyes. "They believe they have no other option but to reintroduce her to her past. They want to tell her everything."

"Bastards!" I seethed, body shaking. After everything they had said about it being bad for her, how it could cause a mental breakdown, they wanted to tell her. "Well that's just not going to happen." I said with gritted teeth as I began to pace the front porch. Sam nodded and crossed his arms. "I would agree with you and do for the most part Jacob, especially since its more than likely for more selfish reasons rather than her wellbeing." "Damn right!" He glared at me when I interrupted him and I huffed. "But with everything she's seen and the fact it may become more dangerous for her, she should know what she's dealing with."

"I can protect her Sam." I glowered at him, not liking the fact this was heading towards the command I could hear in his voice. "She has a right to live a normal life, one that doesn't involve her jumping at every noise in the dark." I said quietly. "She has a right to know what she's up against. She needs to know Jacob."

"She doesn't need to know anything!" I shouted, glaring at him for all I was worth. I focused on him, livid, that he of all people didn't understand. But then I noticed his eyes weren't on mine, but behind me where the doorway was. With a sinking feeling in my stomach, I turned my wide eyes on the person I knew was there. "Bella…" I whispered.

She stood in the doorway, holding herself in that way I so despised. When I started towards her, her head which had been bowed so I couldn't see her face through her thick curtain of hair snapped up. Wet deep pools of brown met mine, awash with so many emotions. "You stop right there Jacob Black!" she shouted, backing up. "Bella, please…let me explain." I started towards her again, but she shook her head, biting hard on her bottom lip. "After everything that has happened, even though you know how lost I am, you want to keep me in the dark? How could you Jacob?"

Sam cleared his throat, and both us snapped our attention to him. "You either tell her or they will Jacob. I got to get on home to Em, but we have a meeting tonight and you're on patrol for early morning." He paused after addressing me and turned a gentler look to Bella, one I had never seen before. "I'll see you around Bella. Be safe." He then turned and walked towards the woods, becoming shrouded in the dense forest quickly.

Tension was thick in the air, and it tore at me. I heard her feet stomp towards the edge of the porch, where she sat on the swing, pulling her legs up and hugging them. "Explain." She all but spat, and I frowned at her. "No Bella. I'm not going to damage you anymore than you already are." I said turning to look at her fully. "I heard everything Jacob, I need to know." She glared at me and if looks could kill, I'd be under five times. "I said no and that all I have to say." I sighed running my hands through my hair, frustrated. "I'm not doing this because I want to honey, I just don't want you to get hurt or be more involved than you already are." Liar. 'Scared.'

She stared me down for a moment and nodded rising from her place on the chair, her arms still wrapped around her tightly. "Fine." I couldn't stand it any longer and I took four large strides and enveloped her in my arm. "I'm sorry Bells." She remained stiff in my arms, and I tightened my embrace, feeling like I was losing her. Her next words made me feel that even more. "If you won't tell me, then they will."

Body tense, wolf howling inside me at the thought of that I pulled away from her and looked at her in pure disbelief. "Seriously Isabella? You're going to fight that dirty?" she looked visibly shocked when her full name came from my lips, and I have to admit it felt like the ugliest of cures. But I was angry so words spouted from my lips like vomit. "Just like old times then, you don't get what you want so you back to him? Fine! Fucking make me feel like shit for trying to protect you from yourself!"

I threw up my arms and walked down the stairs quickly, getting away from her so I could phase. Fuck this day, it had started like shit, and then just when I thought it couldn't get any better, it combusts into flames. "You said that too." I barely heard her whisper, but damned if my entire being wasn't attuned to her. "What did I say Bella." I said through gritted teeth. The pain was coming back, and it was worse because I had had a taste of the forbidden fruit. "In my dream." I heard her shift and the light sound of her footsteps. Arms wrapping around me from behind, she laid her head between my shoulder blades and sighed.

"You told me you would always protect me, even if it was from myself." Tears ran down my skin and I was hard pressed not to turn to her. "I'm sorry for whatever I've done to you in the past, I don't know what it is, but you need to know that though Edward means a great deal to me." She paused taking a shuttering breath, and I couldn't stop myself when I threaded our fingers together. I felt her lips curve in a small smile, and some of my anger bled out. "I mean I know there's a connection between him and I, I've felt it when-" the anger again "-but nothing compares to what's here Jacob. Like I said I feel like I'm tied to you, I feel better when you're around. I feel like I a whole person and not so lost."

I couldn't take it any more so I turned to face her, her arms grasping at my biceps. "Bells, I know you may feel that now-" "STOP!" she shouted. "I don't know what's happened in the past, but I know I've always felt this way. I have to have felt this way, it's so strong. It scares me sometimes." She cried and I pulled her closer, shushing her. I held her tightly to me and shuddered at how badly this would hurt if this ended the way that I kept predicting. But what was I if not glutton for punishment. "It's getting late Bella, and if I remember correctly you're going back to school tomorrow."

'Sam's right.' I thought. "Jake-please I need to-" I chuckled and stepped away from her, and her hands reached out to catch me, I barely alluded them. "So I'll take you home, and then pick you up from school tomorrow and we'll talk then okay?" her mouth opened in shock and then she nodded quickly, running to catch up with me and I walked towards the woods. "Really?" her voice sounded so hopeful. "Sure sure, now step back."

"Wha-Why? Oh." I pulled off my clothes and quickly phased, and my wolf preened himself as Bella amazed eyes analyzed him. "You're so pretty Jake." I snorted and leaned down. She looked shocked. "You're not serious? You want me to ride you?" I barked at her and she shook her head and shrugged, approaching me to throw one leg over me, settling lightly on my back. "What do I hang on to?" I shook a little as I stood and began padding deeper in the forest. She took grabbed onto my thick fur and I leaned back to lick her. "Really Jake!" she giggled and I felt like we were okay again. Once she had a good grip I took off in a faster, barking happily when she'd squeal in surprise or a laugh in excitement. 'How it should be.'

'Maybe, Jake, maybe." Leah answered.

'Go get 'er man!' From Embry.

'A Dual then!' Quil shouted.

With any luck after all this mess blew over, and Bella regained her memories, and the king bloodsucker was burned to ashes, I might just get my chance with Bella. She nuzzled deeper into my fur as we reached the edge of her yard and I leaned down to let her down. I stepped into the shadows and once I had phased back, pulled my pants on. Walking back out into the moonlight, I caught my breath as I stared at the girl I loved. She turned and looked at me, eyes full of something I had never seen in them. I reached her side, cupping her face in one of my hands and we just stared at each other, communicating with the feelings in our eyes, rather than words. "Tell Charlie that I'm doing maintenance on your truck, and I can pick you up after school. I'll see you about 3:30?" I whispered, tucking her hair behind her ear. She smiled, nodding. I grinned back, ready to retreat and patrol, when I felt her lips graze my cheek quickly. Stunned yet again, I must have had a dumb look on my face because she laughed.

"Thanks for the great night Jake, I can't wait for tomorrow." She released my hand and began making the trip to her door, when she turned. Her eyes slightly haunted, she released a shaky breath. "I'll be safe right? That guy won't come around here." My smile was tight, but it must have reassured her. "I'll be around here with another one of the guys all night; we'll keep you safe honey." She nodded and waved making her way into the house. I didn't turn until I heard the lock click shut. "You can come out now."

"Her futures disappeared again; you are making this very difficult to _see_ when you are around her constantly." A light voice scolded. "Alice, long time no see." I grunted. Out of all the leeches she was the one I didn't actually have too much of a problem with. "What can I do for you?" I asked nonchalantly while I continued to scan the area trying to detect if there were others around. "I'm alone dog." She sniffed and walked more in my direct line of sight. "I came to see what your thoughts on Bella are, and to ask how she's doing." I looked in her direction and noticed her perturbed look. "Why don't you ask her yourself?" Again she frowned. "Bella's not exactly close with anyone but you now, as much as I displeased to say. She'll barely speak to me at all if Edwards around, he makes her nervous."

"Well can you blame her, he kind of radiates predator now that she doesn't remember how much she _**cared**_ for him." I spat the last part in distaste. Alice studied me and I felt like I was under a microscope. "What?" She just shook her head. "You really love her right?" she said lowly and I snorted. "Come on Alice, haven't I proved that over and over again. I mean she pretty much stomped on my heart. But I'm still here. I'll always be here." I mumbled the last part.

She nodded again and we stood in the stillness of the night. "Her future keeps changing, and disappearing over and over. But I keep getting flashes of it. Sometimes she's one of us. Others she's holding a child and I've never seen her more happy." She stared me down and I met her gaze evenly even though my heart was pounding. 'A child.' "The only reason I'm telling you any of this is because I love Bella like she's my own sister and I won't stand for her to be unhappy. I've thought about this a lot and I was disturbed by what I saw."

"Don't you want her to be like all of you though; I thought that would make you happy." I growled. She smiled looking down, sad, and I stopped all the hatred that was flowing through me. "I would be happy if she was turned, that would mean we would be together forever. Like I said she's like a sister, I love her." She looked up at the moon and if she could cry I'm sure she would have been. "In the vision where she's turned, she's beautiful, more beautiful than she already is. She's powerful, she has two gifts. One is she has the ability to block others of our kinds power, and the other is far more remarkable. She doesn't need to feed; she has no need, no drive to kill. She just exists." She looks towards me, her head tilting to the side studying me once more. "In all of these visions, the one thing that sticks out the most is how unhappy she is, and the other is that even though Edward is there, she will not accept him."

I'm shocked, eyes wide and unseeing and the only thing that brings me back is the sound of her voice again. This time it's more amazed and less sad. "The other future I've seen is more in pieces. Only flashes, it never comes quite into focus." She smiles sadly shuffling her feet and looking down. "I've seen her being thrown into the ocean and laughing outrageously, her tripping as Charlie walks her down the aisle. But the one piece that convinced me that I needed to see you was the one that has made me feel something I have not felt in decades."

Damn cryptic vampires and their need for suspense. "What was it Alice, please." I rasped. "She's making cookies in the kitchen, one I've never seen before. She's so happy though, she's glowing and I realize it's because she's heavy with child. But she wears it so well." She grins. "She's still clumsy though, because she trips, but catches herself on the counter before there's anything to worry about, but not before someone sees her." Warmly she describes the next part while I'm in awe. "A boy, about three comes into view."

"_Mommy, yous havta be more careful, I's supposed to make sure you be okay. That's what Daddy said."_

_Bella looks probably chastised, though she's playing her part. "I see, and you have to keep you're promises to Daddy right, we always keep promises." He grins a sunny grin and raises his arms, begging to be picked up. She does just that, and hefts him on her hip. _

"_Sure sure! Can I have a cookie now mommy? You should too, babies hungry, it told me." She laughs warmly and nods and they both grab a cookie._

"I've never seen Bella happier than in that vision." Alice leans back, pulling her arms behind her back and grins. "She's a great mom, and I want her to be." She begins to walk towards me and I'm rooted to the spot, staring at the ground, dumbfounded. Could it really mean what I thought? "Jacob, you must know, the reason I'm telling you this. If Aro succeeds the first future I told you will come to pass, she will live and we will be with her, but she will always be unhappy, and tortured. However if we succeed in protecting her, then she will have the other future." She passes by me, her form almost disappearing along with her scent. But I hear the whisper that filters through the tree's like a promise. "She will have the future with the boy that looks an awful a lot like a certain Jacob Black."

I think I'm crying and despite losing some ground on the war between the Quileute's and the Cullen's I whisper back just loud enough that I know she'll hear me. "Thank you Alice."

AN: That's it for now folks. Hopefully you're all still enjoying ALATEOD and I look forward to posting the next chapter. I'm hoping to have some time this week, but I am beginning school this week as well as studying for a college exam. Let me know what you think and I'll update as soon as possible! Review!


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